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My girl friend is flat chested. How should I react?

+1 vote
5.0K views
asked Dec 27, 2013 in Questions by ibu04 (161 points)
edited Dec 28, 2013 by longhands1

My girlfriend is beautiful and so mesmerizing that I even neglected a major flaw on her body.  She seems flat chested, at least in some pics. Rest of the time I guess she wears a padded bra so small lumps are visible.

She is so beautiful that for many days I did not even notice this thing. But the day I noticed this, this is the only thing in my head. I have always fantasized about a woman with breasts, not very big though. I even tried to reprogram my mind by watching some flat chested porn. But whenever I see another woman or girl, all I look at is their breasts and compare with hers.

I am not a materialistic guy but physical attributes matter in relationships. She is asking for a commitment for marriage and I don't see a possibility of seeing her bare before marriage. Neither can I ask her about this. She would probably slap me and break up.

I am a virgin guy. I have not even touched a woman. So I don't know about sex. What if I don't get turned on seeing her man-like chest. Although, I get a hard-on when we are talking intimately or when I am fantasizing about her.

So I have a dilemma and lots of questions -

1. Should I ask her about her breast size before proposing to her? Or is there a way to know about this without asking her? [I am looking like a complete jerk here. Please try to understand that this commitment will be life long ].

2. Even if she is flat chested, should I go forward? Are fears regarding not getting turn on real or just imaginary. [Husbands or BFs of such girls kindly pitch in].

3. How do I solve this mental problem of looking at other women's breasts and compare them to hers?

All these are silly questions. But they are eating me.

featued question
commented Dec 27, 2013 by longhands1 (23,901 points)

ibu,

It is now mandatory for you to reply as "Comments" to the Answers you have received.  If we do not hear from you, we will not approve the next Question asked by you.

If you get the Answer that satisfies you, you can select it as "The Best Answer". Please wait for atleast 5-6 Answers. You can also give an UP Vote if you like an Answer or DOWN Vote if you do not agree with the Advice.  

Also note,once the queastion has been approved, you should not edit it. If you need some changes made, send me a PM and I will do the needful. If you edit it, we will close the Question.  

Your replies should be in the form of "Comments" and not "Answers".

Regards,

Longhands  -  Moderator


8 Answers

+1 vote
 
Best answer

Men love breasts and their only mantra is ‘the bigger the better’, so don’t get low on yourself; its normal to desire for a woman with bigger breasts but underneath all the physical attributes, I guess you both love each other for what you guys are, so I would ask you to settle down with her rather than looking at her flat chest.

Just because she doesn’t sport a big rack doesn’t mean she is flat chested; some women bloom late, so this girl might start developing breasts post marriage or while lactating. As much as I love seeing a woman with a fine rack, I get excited with a woman who has small breasts. Its actually about the figure you should concentrate on.

Have no doubts about your future sex life. Sex is called love making because you get to express your love through this way, so it doesn’t matter how big you’re and how great figure she has. Good luck with your life mate.

As you rightly mentioned, you’d look like a complete jerk if you ask her breast size, but I guess you can guess for yourself her approximate size by watching her up close without noticing you stare at her breasts. Since you did mention that she showed some cleavage, I guess she is not actually flat chested.

Your fears are absolutely imaginary; there is nothing like that. 1st of all you’re not into her for sex; you have feelings for her and love her, so I don’t think her physical appearance would be an issue.

We desire what we don’t have, so its normal that you compare your girlfriend’s breasts with other women’s breasts; slowly you’d get over this fixation.

answered Dec 27, 2013 by Invincible (13,480 points)
selected Jan 4 by ibu04
commented Dec 30, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
This was the best answer. You actually understood my query and nailed it. Thanks a lot.
commented Jan 1 by Invincible (13,480 points)

Well, I'm glad you found my answer helpful. However I'd be even thrilled if you selected the answer the best rather than merley saying it.

commented Jan 4 by ibu04 (161 points)
I have upvoted your answer. I don't know how to select it as best.
commented Jan 4 by Invincible (13,480 points)

I guess you found out where the option is, so thanks for selecting my answer the best.

0 votes

ibu, It does not or should not matter at all weather a woman with whom you want to spent life with  is flat chasted or have a big boobs. Love her for the person she is and not for her physical attributes ! It seems that you are a 'boobs man' being said that  means you get attracted towards boobs and you fantasise lot about them . But belive me brother from my own experience i would tell you that whenever you would be fortunate enough to see it in real it would be bigger than what you have been imagining for all those days. As cloths could have been playing a trick .But even if they happen to be smaller that what you have been anticipating it does not makes her less of a woman .

       I have experienced many times that flat chasted women are more satisfing in bed than many with bigger boobs. One thing that is bliss with them is while having sex you can have whole of that juicey boob inside your mouth if you wanted to ,which unfortunately becomes next to impossible with a big boobs woman given its size! So i would suggest you to go for a marriage with her and that too with least expectations about boobs size. There are many other advantages like love, care and great sex there for you which are waiting to be plucked! Best of luck!

answered Dec 27, 2013 by prashant69 (4,198 points)
commented Dec 27, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
Thanks bro.
commented Dec 27, 2013 by prashant69 (4,198 points)

On second thought i would suggest you a way for finding out her size . As the 14th feb is coming in shortly after few days, think of giving her a good lacy bra as gift on valentine's day present. That way you can take her to shop and could find first hand what exactly her size without being in compromising as well as embressing position. Just think over this. 

0 votes
You are very confused. Why these questions sudden start eating you? Do not you aware of her small breasts at the starting of the relationship. This is not such fact that comes in your relationship suddenly? Have you wanted fun in this relationship, if yes than I would like to tell you that fun never comes free?

I find contrary in your question, on the one hand, you are saying that she is beautiful and on the other hand, you find fault in her body and that too which is not in her hand to overcome. Accept her body physique as it is and go ahead if rest thing are normal and you love each other. Small breasts are not genuine reason from your part. She is not only girl in the world with flat chest thousand of girls around the world who have small breasts.

Are you concerned to others opinion?  Do not care about others opinions. She is beautiful just the way she is! People just like to talk about others just to make themselves feel good. They are stupid! Some girls have big boobs and some have smaller. Everybody is different and beautiful in his or her own way. Some girls might have big boobs but are ugly. Who cares what they think! She might have small breasts but I am sure she is going to grow. Do not let others put her down. Be strong, ignore them, and help her for the same. Wait and everything will happen.

I dated a girl who has small chest size. I absolutely LOVED IT. You would be surprised that most guys do not care about the size of a girls chest. It is the actual girl. I am sure you wished your girlfriend had them bigger. However, she is perfect the way she is. You might not see it now. However, one day you will realize that you are wrong. Forget about what that dumb said about her. I wish I were still dating that girl. She was incredible. What she claimed she was missing on her chest she made up for in other areas while having sex. She was comfortable enough to get naked. I was not disgusted at all. I loved every part of her. You just have to realize that there are some guys that are not mature enough to appreciate a woman's body.

If you want to have one-night stands with strangers, I can understand your worry. If you are still confused with your worry then you should make this clear to your girlfriend. Do  not take any decision without being 100% sure otherwise that will disturb your future life. Show some courage and discuss the matter with her, probably she will help you to take the decision. Do not make her suffer on your account, as she is innocent.

Go ahead and get married to her.
answered Dec 27, 2013 by alpesh kapdi (6,203 points)
commented Dec 27, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
Yes I did not notice them in the beginning. But as I told you the day I noticed suddenly breast started seeming important to me. Probably the problem is only psychological.
0 votes
The only criteria for a girl to be sexually attractive to  NORMAL HEALTHY guys, is that she is young and not physically deformed.

Having a flat chest is not a physical deformity. Its pretty normal for a lot of girls to have , what can seemingly be flat chests, when they are younger.

Her chest will  'grow' with time and attention...
answered Dec 27, 2013 by blindMan (1,025 points)
commented Dec 30, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
Thanks bro for the answer.
commented Jan 12 by luvwalle (100 points)
if u like a girl then why u thinking about flat chest .She married to a men some day then u realise so if u love her go forward marry her and this issue is very big if u know each other very well .flat breast can also treated medically
0 votes
I'll share my experience... when i was engaged with my wife ( arrange marriage) she was having average boobs. (34 b) and her best friend was almost flat chested. these two ladies married on same day. after a year my wife having a very big boobs (36 d) and no cloths suits her other than sarees where as her friend is having now the beautiful pairs almost 34 c. that she looks gorgeous in every cloth.

                  my point is when Men touches these boobs they grow up naturally due to flow of sexual hormones in the female body. I have a noticed a lot of cases like this that flat chested girl looks so beautiful after her marriage with average boobs.

               IN your as the girl is already beautiful (as you say) she will look like a angel after marriage . So go for it.
answered Dec 27, 2013 by kunaluma (193 points)
commented Dec 27, 2013 by kunaluma (193 points)
i never able to touch my wife's boob as i asked the doctor that how to reduce their size, the doctor said it cant be reduced any more but sure that you dont touch them they will not grow more.
commented Dec 30, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
Thanks kunaluma.
0 votes
Think ,you are confused.Even if a girl were to be flat chested,which we normally call as resembling a tennis court,you are unaware of what is in store,as long as you haven't seen or tasted one.They will never be like a man's boobs,but will have slight flesh and an inviting nipples.In my experience,I was taken aback to see a tiny one for the first time,though my own are  huge.The best part is that even after  many years they will not sag and will remain firm for you to smooch,bite,lick and suck.Tiny ones will be awesome and inviting,as,they can go inside your mouth and make it full.If they were to be bigger you can only suck them or bite a portion.But when they are small,they are beautiful,makes a man horny and when you chew them they arouse the woman so much that the fucking thereafter will be memorable!
answered Dec 28, 2013 by Kamalkannan (1,292 points)
edited Dec 28, 2013 by prashant69
commented Dec 30, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
Thanks Kamalkannan.
0 votes

ibu,

You have got Life by the wrong end. First you speak of your girlfriend's beauty and then complain about her being flat chested. Beauty is only skin deep and over time will diminish, but a person's innate qualities and nature will last for ever. What you mean - major flaw? Shame on you. Everyone is born unique and is the Creator's Gift to mankind.

There is no point in trying to figure out her breast size etc. What you see is whsat you get and since you are not happy with what you see, the chances are that you will have to live with that for the rest of your Life. It is obvious that physical attributes are important to you, so you need to decide now. Do not be under the impression that the breasts will increase in size after you marry. The only way that can happen is when she puts on weight. 

You have rightly said that this committment is life long. If you wish to spend the rest of your Life with her, it will always bother you that your wife is flat chested. 

What will you ask her? Please show me your breasts so that I can decide whether I want to marry you? I am happy that you are aware that she will slap you and break off the relationship. (Your words!!)

Sorry for being so blunt. Sometimes the Truth hurts.

answered Dec 28, 2013 by longhands1 (23,901 points)
edited Dec 29, 2013 by longhands1
commented Dec 28, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
there was a reason I didn't ask this question quora or yahoo answer. I did not want a lecture. I had silly but genuine queries basically regarding sex. I have mentioned that I am virgin and dont have much practical knowledge of sex. that's what this forum is for.
she has rejected guys purely on physical attributes. I did not mentioned this because it was irrelevant for the question.
commented Dec 28, 2013 by longhands1 (23,901 points)
ibu,

Learn to accept advice. Do not expect Advice that you want to hear. What has sex got to do with physical attributes. Sex is all in the mind. If the mind does not accept a person, it will never succeed in creating a relationship. Nothing is irrelevant when you ask a question. We are not clairvoyant to guess what the situation is. We comment on the basis of information you provide.

In any case, truth is always bitter.
commented Dec 30, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
Thanks for the advice. Actually this relationship is in very nascent stages and I would go ahead only if I am sure that she is the one I want to spend my rest of life with.
My questions were silly. As I have mentioned that I have no practical knowledge of sex. I have always been busy with books so no idea about boobs. But I actually like her. Did you not read the part that I am trying to reprogrrame my brain by watching some flat chested porn. (Stupid line, right.)
This is the first time I will be in a relationship so I just wanted to be sure. That's why I asked the question. Again I might want to regret the use of the word 'flaw'. Everyone is perfect in their own way.
commented Dec 31, 2013 by longhands1 (23,901 points)
ibu,

Sorry for being so harsh with my advive. Maybe I could have put it differently. Beauty they say is in the eyes of the beholder. I understand that we all learn about sex over a period of time. We are not born with the knowledge. Be patient. Enjoy the friendship. You dont have to decide at this point in time whether you are going to be spending the rest of your life with her, but be honest with yourself. Have a great year ahead.
0 votes
friend for sex,for real love or for true love and sex after marriage,small breast or flat breast does not matter.breast is not only a part of girl which make a male organ erect or attract.suppose ur wife hv a big breast but u both hv no understanding.u dnt enjoy ur sex life.main thing is understanding after all a girl is girl  and big breast mean not a symbol of good girl.so dnt worry abt flat chest if u love her from ur heart.and dnt worry if u hv plan for marry this girl.this is not a big matter of discussion........
answered Dec 28, 2013 by samsung4real (105 points)
commented Dec 30, 2013 by ibu04 (161 points)
Thanks bro.
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