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How to bring excitement to our boring sex life?

asked Aug 15, 2013 in Questions by priyank (220 points)
edited Aug 15, 2013 by longhands1
Hi Anjali,

My name is Priyank and I am 20 years old. Me and my girlfriend are in a relation since three years now.

We are recently practicing sex. We are new to this thing. So please Anjali ji, suggest us some tips to make our moments memorable rather than painful.

I will be greatful if you give us some suggestions. Thank you.


(Re-edited as poorly done earlier).
commented Aug 15, 2013 by oye (25,695 points)

I didnot change your title, that brings a different dimension to your query.

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Dear Priyank,

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answered Aug 16, 2013 by Anjali (7,465 points)
selected Aug 17, 2013 by priyank
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Use a condom to avoid psychological/mental 'pain' from any resulting pregnancies after.. Better still, avoid sex if you are unable to accept the realities of pregnancy.

Otherwise, at your ages, you are all set to 'instinctively' enjoy sex to its maximum. There are plenty of resources /articles on the net to guide.

Unless ofcourse, you have a specific question.  your post is too vague  to merit a specific response.
answered Aug 15, 2013 by blindMan (1,035 points)
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Like anything else, sex too can beboring sometimes. But thanks to methods that you can keep enjoying sex with the same partner without getting bore. There are many ways. One of them is trying new positions if you both are comfortable with those. Having insertion in new ways certainly increases the pleasure. Also, if you're having protected sex(you must have), then using a good quality condom too affects. It will the make the moment more pleasurable and a kind of feel good for you both.
Aslo, as you've talked about pain, so to avoid it, never rush. Have some time. Have sex only when you've plenty of time and ofcourse privacy. Give time in foreplay. Also, if you don't want any trouble later(certainly you don't want), then have protected sex. Cleanliness is of great importance here. And remeber, the will and comfort of both the partner is important. You can't do anything against her will or like, just for your enjoyment. So, kepp these in minds and enjoy.
answered Aug 15, 2013 by raaz67 (835 points)
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Since you have just started, i believe more than repeatation  its the pain that's causing an issue, well the best solution is to take as much time as possible, indulge in maximum amount of foreplay so that there is ample lubrication, if still pain persists then try using lubes may be the durex play range could be helpful. You can also try various position like the girl on top & doggy style which can add more pleasure. Have you tried oral sex it should add more spice to your sex life. While enjoying all the pleasures ensure to be responsible & always use condoms to prevent any complications later......
answered Aug 15, 2013 by Sudeep Mohan (3,135 points)
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Sex seems to be boring only if there is nothing new to it. You can try different positions, oral sex, be kinky some times and spice up your sex life. Allways try something new to it as whenever you will go for an experiment you both will get more and more pleasure, watch some porn for more ideas and have fun. Dont be brutal and hurt her physically  Be calm and loving Bf

As far as your Pain related issue, you said you people are having sex means there is not genital pain you are talking about and for future to avoid pain related to pregnancy please use condoms as Pills has side effects on the female body and not a good preventive. For Emotional pain due to separation, you people cam marry each other and live happily .
answered Aug 15, 2013 by fsimale4u (1,185 points)
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The best sex it is said is in the head. What do I mean? Sex is about building a comfort level with your partner and this is only possible with communication. So rather than concentrating on the physical aspects of sex, concentrate on the building block of sharing your mind and thoughts.  This will make it easy to discuss what you both are comfortable in sex. Often sex becomes akward, when first started because there is no communication. 

You talk about pain. There should not be any pain. It means you are not giving sufficient time in foreplay. What is foreplay? It is about holding your partner, saying sweet nothings in her ear, nibbling parts of her body that excites her and caressing her, before you proceed. Build up the excitement, before you progress. Many men forget that there are more than 2 parts of a woman's body that can be tittillated and enjoyed.

All of us when we first ventured out had sex for the first time, so you are not alone. Build up the passion. Start with communication. All the best.

answered Aug 15, 2013 by longhands1 (93,455 points)
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Lets see what we have here, you are 20 (earlier said 21), and in a relationship for 3 years, have started se recently. You asked, how to make an excitement sex. 

From your question content you are asking for tips on making sex fulling of excitement, from your title you are talking about boring. Now which one to take, honestly, I dont know. 

Either you have started having sex and feel its boring, nothing like how you heard before. So looking for excitement. Or you are looking for great tips of great sex. I have problem with both the instances. First is, sexual pleasure is kind of a curve, it keeps growing higher due to change of time, add new things, position, experiment  etc, it only gets better. After certain time, the upward curve gets flat, on that time one need to add some new idea or think out of the box to get the curve higher again. You have started and already got bored, man, you need to spend more time on this site or other sites if required to learn about physiology, pleasure point, reasoning behind acts, etc. On second part, if you want a checklist of pleasure tricks, hell, we all are doing here in this site. There is no sure shot trick here, how we discuss issues, learn from there and apply based on two consenting adults spirit. If this was a checklist, we would have not so many members, so many question and replies, it would be a Newton's three principle, just accept and execute.

Stay with us, and read for your own need. As I missed my comment before on the upward curve, usual time is around 7 years for getting in the saturation point before it gets bored. You are already bored, thats a severe concern, means you are no longer keen on her, the land is won, its the property now explore new lands. 

Finally, you are pretty young, take care of health and consequence, use condom without a fail. Dont try for safe days danger days rule, we know how to act on those, you are too new to know the rhythm.

answered Aug 15, 2013 by oye (25,695 points)
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You want to enjoy your boring sex life..?? You wrote you two have just started to involve in sex. I think you want spicy sexual life with your partner. Although your age is to make a storm in bed, i can't understand why you are getting bored.
If you really want to make your moments golden, remember three things during intimacy. 1) Safe sex, 2) Creating Romantic Environment, 3) Foreplay
Safe sex- You both have to take the protection(Condom, Pills etc). Hope both of you are out of any sexual diseases. Make yourself neat and clean during sex beacause if you do oral sex, both of yours genitals should be clean and don't forget to brush well everyday, specially before sex. Me and my wife always keep our mouth fresh before smooching each other. It helps us for a long smooching session.

Creating Romantic Environment- Making the environment ready for sexual activity is very important. In our married life, we always prefer a good condition to intimate. It's not only a healthy process but it can lengthier your whole activity as well. Take a good bath along with your girlfriend, Apply good body sprey, make the room fill with nice odour by applying room freshner. You can also decorate your room with full of heart shaped balloons, pillows etc if you have the time. It will be great if you can lit the candles. In market there are so many choices of flavored candles are available. You both can wear sexy dresses, buy pretty lingeries for your love, ask your partner what does she like to wear in bed.

Third and most important part is foreplay. From my personal level i can say you that me and my wife both are very much deep into it and it's a spark to burn. A proper foreplay can make both of your body a volcano. How to do proper foreplay..?? I think it's a human instinct, nobody can teach you, just you have to change the game according to the circumstances. But one thing for sure that start with deep kissing and romantic/erotic talking to your partner. You both will feel the emotional involvement. Unless and until you are feeling emotional bonding to each other, your sex life can't reach that maximum level. Before approaching to foreplay, make your mind free from any tension. You can find many writings in net or in books on foreplay but at the end of the day it will come to a point where you will be asked for what you and your partner want.

Discuss with your girlfriend what both of you need during sex, what should be a good spicy bed journey according to both, read the articles over the net / read the good sex manual books along with her and finally create your own world according to your choice. Remember again, sexual happiness always depend upon the partners perceptions and it varies to man to man, woman to woman. So, respect your partner's choice and raise the heat in bed.. GOOD LUCK.
answered Aug 15, 2013 by jeevaansathi (270 points)
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The best way to enjoy sex is to build up good communication with her. Since you’re in the initial changes, identify what excites both of you and work towards them.

If your girlfriend likes or gains pleasure when you go down on her or when you play with her body, devote more time in doing that, look for ways to please her by doing those. Have a clear talk to her and share both your feelings, fantasies, desires etc.......

There are several articles which have been written in the old days on the pleasure spots, techniques to enjoy quality sex, swing back to them and educate yourselves.

answered Aug 15, 2013 by Invincible (12,550 points)
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Dear Priyank, Sex can be boring if it done with same routine like our duty. Sex is for enjoyment, entertainment or one of the best way of loving your partner bycoming so close to each other. For romantic sex life, try new things which comes in your mind, but cleanliness of your body is must. You can find lot of sex position on internet so no need of telling here. Forplay techniques which comes naturally rather than anyother thing. Enjoy sex every time. Turn on your partner, tease her, if you do all this then ask your partner to satisfy you today and you don't involve in this, this can be pleasurable to know how your partner satisfy you, enjoy blindfolded sex with one of the two partners. What thing is required is patience. Sex life is enjoyable only when you done it with comfort, pateince and by the interest of your partner. Surely you will not get bored by your sex life.
answered Aug 17, 2013 by Manoj4u (6,205 points)

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