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I am not divorced but in a live-in relationship, is that illegal?

asked Jul 10, 2013 in Questions by chandra1980 (125 points)
edited Jul 10, 2013 by land crusier
Hi Anjali ji, I am 32 years old and married 5 years ago. Currently I am seperated from my wife but didnt took any steps for divorce. Recently I met my old friend, she is not married and decided to get into a live-in relationship and now liveing together. Now my question is whether it will lead to any complications with my current wife as I have not applied for divorce as for now.

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5 Answers

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hey chandra, see if you are legally seperated with your wife , then you have nothing to worry about you can indulge with someone if you and your wife are legally seperated , but if you are not legally seperated and just living apart , this can be counted as adultery, and also if you are legally seperated it is okay to have an affair but you cant make anything of that relationship untill you get divorced , it would not count as a live in relationship in the eyes of law, it would jus be an affair.

so my advice for you would be file the legal papers as soon as possible , or if you plan to reconcile your differences with your wife do it also in other words make a decision and start unwinding your life , it could be meesy for a while but it is important if you and and your wife want to move on in life.

answered Jul 11, 2013 by parik89 (2,190 points)
selected Jul 11, 2013 by chandra1980
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If your wife gets a smell of what you’re doing, she might claim that you’re cheating on her with another woman and are in a live-in relationship and claim for a divorce where in you cannot plead your case, because there is no escaping the law here. According to the Indian Penal Code, IPC sec.497, the punishment for adultery is imprisonment up to 5yrs. Therefore, men planning to indulge in sexual congress outside of marriage are urged to consider the following:

a) It is only adultery if the said congress occurs with a married woman, without the permission of the husband. Hence, in order to avoid a jail sentence, it’s better to take written consent from him. This makes it legal.

b) It is not adultery if a married man has congress with an unmarried woman or a widow. In such cases, no penalty applies.

c) In case the matter is urgent, and it becomes essential to have sex with a married woman, try to make sure that the said sex is non-consensual. This does not qualify as adultery.

The law is clear with this, but one has to note that under the IPC a woman cannot be prosecuted for adultery, so even if there is proof that the woman has cheated, she isn’t eligible for any punishment.

However since you’re in relationship with a single woman, you would surely escape the punishment, but why do you want to delay the inevitable? You and your wife aren’t happy with each other, so call it a day and take a divorce; in fact when the divorce is mutual, the proceedings would happen fast and you can get involved with the woman you love/like. You’re separated already, but why din’t you initiate the divorce proceedings all this while? I wouldn’t say it would get too bad, but there can be certain complications, so apply for a divorce.

answered Jul 10, 2013 by Invincible (12,550 points)
commented Jul 11, 2013 by chandra1980 (125 points)
Tnx bro.... vry gud information n my case is related to category (b) and with regard to divorce my wife is not coming up for divorce n presently she left for london n doesnt  know when she returns...if I apply for divorce she has to attend r her counsel can attend ? N once thanks for the information.
commented Jul 11, 2013 by Invincible (12,550 points)

The court would send in the summons to the other party and after waiting for 3 extensions, if the party is still not present in person before the court, the divorce will be finalized. And if your wife's attorney moves a plea to make sure he can argue the case on behalf of her without her present in the court room, the court may grant the permission if it deems fit.

As much as you guys broke up on friendly grounds, a woman will always be in pain to learn that she has been left by her husband, so she must be hesitant to face you right now.

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I know friend giving divorce is not that easy. We people can easily say go for a divorce, but for a male it isnt so easy. I know some financial dispute must there, if she isnt working and a house wife you got to pay her expense monthly even after divorce.
Anyhow you can deal with it if there is some sot of financial dispute accordingly when time permits. You can get into a live in relationship with your old friend. But remeber dont get registered anywhere. I have cousin and he did the same, still his divorce petition is pending after 3 years of sepration and he is boldly in a live in with his ex school mate and his wife is aware of it. In a live in relationship it becomes almost impossible to prove that the couple had commited adultery
If your wife does not give for her consent after 3 years of sepration you can apply for divorce. I hope you do not have kids with your wife, if you have in that case another financial burden of your kids will be on your head till they start earning on their own. And the most worst will the mental impact on them.
Sometimes things dont work and we realize we are in a mess too late. But thats life, pray for the best friend and apply for divorce as soon as you can, take help from some relatives and friends get rid of this hanging sword.
wish you luck and a happy future.
answered Jul 11, 2013 by land crusier (3,145 points)
edited Jul 11, 2013 by land crusier
commented Jul 11, 2013 by chandra1980 (125 points)
Tnx for the answer n to say further I dont have any financial issues n both r eell settled n we separeted in a friendly manner. But later she is not turning up for divorce n moved to london. Any suggestions
commented Jul 12, 2013 by land crusier (3,145 points)
Then you are clean, just meet lawyer and file for divorce. As after 3 years of sepration you can apply for divorce even if your partner is not consenting. Rest Invincible nailed it. It might take some time although.
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First of all I want to know that even you are separated do you really want divorce? For a male it is easy to say for divorce but not easy to do so.  I think you are in between what to do and what not to. In this case the life is very complex. If you have child, as Land Crusier said, the most worst will the mental impact on your child.

If you really want divorce, you should apply for divorce and if you don't know what to do than you should wait and watch. Wait for few more years, think every situation and aspect  of life and decide what to do. But don't be hurry.
answered Jul 11, 2013 by Sailesh (370 points)
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Hi Chandra,
In India the live-in relationship does not have a legal acceptance, so its still possible that you can find yourself on the wrong side of law. Now since you are living apart from your wife for the last 5 years, why don't you think of bringing it a legal sanctity by getting a divorce, also why you opted for a live-in relationship when you could have officially married to your current partner (after getting the divorce)? do you think that you can still patch up with your wife sometime?
You have actually handed down a weapon to your legal wife which will help her support her case for a divorce if & when she goes for one. Have you ever though what will happen if you decide on starting a family with your current live-in partner. So if you are serious about your current partner the best option is to get a divorce at the earliest!!!!
answered Jul 11, 2013 by Sudeep Mohan (3,125 points)

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