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Dear Anjali,

I am a 49 year old woman from Colombo, Sri Lanka. I was married at 18 years and I am living with my husband.

He is not a kind hearted husband. He likes to fight all the time. For last 17 years, we don't have sex. He is also not interested and I didn't want to go near him. Whenever I crave for sex, I masturbate. We sleep in separate rooms. But very recently about the last 4 years, I'm getting the urge more and I want a man to love me and fulfill my sex hunger.

I don't know why. Is it because I'm getting older or lonely? I am getting depressed because of this. Will this urge vanish as it come or increase? We are from a more conservative family. I can't even talk and discuss this with any family members and friends. All will think it is ugly to feel like this and may kill me with their words. Hence I'm using this site to get a solution. But I am dying be near a man and feel his hugs and love. But this definitely I can't ever get from my husband. He is impossible. There are people you can't change who stick to their character. 17 years of waiting and expecting love from him is more than enough.

How can I solve this? Will I become sick of this? Its killing me – this sex hunger. How can I get a kind man and approach him without breaking anybody's heart? I know its cheating but I have no options. There may be thousands of mature women who have this problem. At least for one day, I want to have beautiful and protected sex with some kind person, which I have never experienced in my lifetime. I have children.

Please show me a good way to fulfill my sex urge.

Anjali's Note – This is NOT a "give me your contact details and let fuck" sex ad. Anyone found posting their emails or phone numbers in their answers just for the sake of soliciting sex will be deleted and marked as spam. Answer only if you can offer constructive advise.

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15 Answers »

1. First of all try to get yourself financially independent….sweetheart you're already 49 years old…..we get one life and you have spent most of it curbing your desires…..what do you have to lose now ?? you're batting in the second innings…so do yourself a favor…I'm sure that you're kids are grown up and mature enough to understand that you need love too….I suggest get a divorce, move to a new city , get a job and find a guy…make the best of whatever you have left…..or you can go to your death bed hoping that if you had a little courage life would have been different…..

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   Answer by apacheking12 — March 14, 2010

2. arey yaar apache…its easy to say but its hard to execute it..especially in countries like india…divorce n all that is considered as a big mistake buddy. n u know how it goes in india esp with women..its pathetic man but what ever it is i have been reading this blog from a long timebut never answered it but i answered for the first time today
   anjali..great job…

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   Answer by frends — March 14, 2010

3. Dear Thani,
    
   Your problem is genuine & I fully sympathise with you.
    
   You have to take initiative to look for that kind guy,  yourself  through your internet skill or your own local contacts.
    
   I can only give you the go ahead signal & support you for this action of yours.
    
   Regards,
    
   Phoolwati

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   Answer by Phoolwati — March 14, 2010

4. hey frends I completely understand what you are saying….but my point is she is 49 years old.she has already lived the better part of her life….if i were 50 years old I wouldn't give a damn…I mean 50 years she had lived the life that was expected of her as a wife and as a mother…I think it is time that whatever life she has got left she makes the most of it…let us accept that fact that after 60 o maybe max 65 she is not going to enjoy life as much as she can now….thats the reason for my suggestion…..but I do appreciate your feedback…..

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   Answer by apacheking12 — March 14, 2010

5. I can truly understand ur problem. Try going for a councilling service. There are many places to go in colombo. In fact I work for one of those. Drop us a mail on sumithrayoo@gmail.com. I'm sure you have heared of our organisation. Feel free to open up and write to us. We should be able to help you with your currrent situation.

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   Answer by Mariann — March 15, 2010

6.  
   Hi thani,
   Life is once liven and you have wasted most of it. U hv very less time to enjoy your present urge. But as well at this part of life its not advisable to leave your family. I have solved a similar case for one of my friend and she is very much happy and satisfied. She is living happily with her family too.

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   Answer by Vino Kumar — March 15, 2010

7. 
   It seems Anjali's not to post mail ID backfired. Most of the answers are with ID… hahahah.

   Anyway, listen lady, what you are going through is normal phase of life.  Before going through menopause, the craving is more.  At 49, you should be having your menopause, if not, you are about to.

   This craving will remain for some time, can be 6 moths to 3 years.  But soon you would lose interest.

   But I am really sorry to hear about your husband not having sex with you for 17 years.  Well, he is a man, must have found some outlet, leaving you alone.  Time to make a peace and start sharing the same bed.  Life is too long to keep a fight.  People get married to have a companion, sex is a secondary part.  The companionship remains, just like the ad of SRK in Dish TV, older you get the need you feel more to have someone beside you.

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   Answer by Oye … — March 15, 2010

8. YOu are the worriior, since 17 years you tolerate him lolz
   

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   Answer by FrankShk — March 17, 2010

9. Behave like you haveing  a sexual relationship with someone (only some tricks)  that may  make him move,
   Just Tyr

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   Answer by darkmaker — March 17, 2010

10. You really have patience..controlled your urge for 17 years….Great. First of all, if you want kep the things within, buy a Dildo.Its easy to procure via net or from behind doors of botique shops. This may atleast ease your Pussie. But if you really need a live Cock then you shoud  try through internet.. Further, not aware of what kind of circle you are around..may fine someone of your age from within who is also in need of your kind of lady. You know the society..there are ladies of your age not interested in sex at all while their husbands are active but cannot get enough..so you need to take chance…both the sides will be safe and thus satisfy the urge.
    With regards,
    Harshad51

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    Answer by Harshad51 — March 18, 2010

11. contect me plz. my email id
    uma198634@rediffmail.com

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    Answer by umakant — March 25, 2010

12. plz contact me 
    viju17_1987@yahoo.com

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    Answer by vijay — April 3, 2010

13. Hi Thani. I have sent you a mail in redards to your matter. You can check it out and give me feed backs

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    Answer by Mariann — April 7, 2010

14. i would suggest u to just take a vacation to some relatives place.. if there is a sister for u… speak to her..

    or a frnd. u may getter advice in person from people u know. we can only suggest u compromise or move around find some one for sex thats it.
    if u luking for sex only u can find it by just trying carefully.
    best of luck…. i hope u get satisfied.. u can get in touch with guys who would be willing to  have sex with u here as well,,, by replying to their answers…

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    Answer by SA — May 11, 2010

15. Pls mail to me ms.kavan@rediffmail.com
    Regards,
    Kavan

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    Answer by Kavan — May 21, 2010

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