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Dear Anjali aunty and friends,

I am a 27 year old male in love with a much younger girl. I thought she loved me so much till I discovered something recently. I have a best friend who is always with us most of the times. He is a bit tall and boasts of having a big size with every girl he meets. He got married recently.

Last month, all four of us (me and my girlfriend along with him and his wife) went for a winter camp to the hills. After a week of camping, we went back home. After the camping I could visibly see some changes in my girlfriend. She was not talking to me properly and not even wanting to receive any phone calls. I was very much surprised!

One day when we were having sex I tried to talk to her about it. She cried a little bit and asked me to maintain my calm. I got more curious and just told her to tell me whatever it is. Then she told me that she had slept with my best friend during the camping when I was gone with my friend’s wife for a walk to the woods. She begged for forgiveness and told me not to confront my best friend as she promised him not to tell anybody. She also told me she felt really guilty and that was the reason she couldn’t be herself after coming back from camping.

I was completely shocked! I didn’t know what to say. I was stunned and completely speechless. Well during our sex, we used to talk about our fantasies and one of the fantasies used to be my girl having sex with my best friend. Just for creating excitement during the sex, but when it came for real I got completely devastated. I didn’t know what to say. I just stopped the conversation and left the room. I took almost a week to recover from this incident. By then my girlfriend always called me up and my best friend also visited me several times. I was in a very difficult situation because I couldn’t confront my best friend about it as I had made a promise to my girlfriend and I am also worried that his married life will be destroyed.

On the other hand I could not leave my girlfriend because I am in so much love with her. I love her to the extent that I am ready to forgive her but the problem is that my best friend comes now and then to my place. He doesn’t know if my girlfriend has revealed the secret to him or not. Whenever I meet him I cannot be myself as I used to be. He has also noticed it in me. I don’t know how to handle this complicated situation. I have decided in my mind to keep my girlfriend but what to do with my best friend? I feel cheated, I feel like I want to confront him and kick his butt.

Please suggest me my friends.

Regards,

(8 votes, average: 3.63 out of 5)
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58 Answers »

1. 
   

   Mr. Frustrated,

   Time is the best medicine for any wound (Waqt sab sey bada marham hai) and that’s true. Don’t do any thing, infact nothing you can do. Just give time to yourself and after some time every thing will be OK.

   You can’t blame any one; it was you who have created such situation. Haven’t you talked about your fantasies about your girlfriend getting fucked by your best friend with your GF? It was you, who have made a frame in her mind and by that step it came to a reality.

   A frustrated man can do any thing, any thing which only leaves to a disaster. Yes, it’s only you who can feel the situation which you are going through right now. But try to understand the situation you cannot go back and change the things. It happened, the best thing is your girlfriend loves you and she had confess it to you. What if she has kept it discreet and she continued her relations with him on your back. She is also feeling guilt and confessed to you, because she loves you.

   You have to accept her that she is honest. Though it’s very hard to digest what happened. Buddy don’t think that your friend is more good looking than you that’s why he won your girlfriend. No, that was an incident which happened some times things happens unexpectedly.

   Just try to be kool and after some time it will be alright. The bottom line is your girlfriend loves you and she had confessed.

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   Answer by hydspesial — February 1, 2010

2. Dear mate.,
   I appricate your open minded that you accept your girlfriend even after that incident.., also you make clear your self that without the permission of your girlfriend your friend cant slept with her… who ever the person ( Best friend or relatives or brother) if a girl seduce them, they will accpet it.. its a guys nature…. dont mistake me that i am saying your girlfriend is wrong…, make sure your self before finalishing something…., For eg : if your friend came to know about this, than for an saferside if he told she only needs me not me…! than the position will be criticial.. hope you undrstand…, my suggestion is, what happend was happened….! just forget it.., pls find who made the mistake..!! if your best friend, leave him.. if your girl friend, leave her…, thats it…
   take care..,

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   Answer by raj — February 1, 2010

3. move on my friend
    
   hats off to your girlfriend for sharing it with you…she has not only messed up your relationship but also your friendship..
    
   she is a stupid woman and i would suggest you leave her and your friend. She made a promise to him and did not keep it. He did something wrong and still behaves normally…
    
   something really fishy…don't you think?

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   Answer by drnibble — February 1, 2010

4. You stupid fuck. You must beat the shit out of your best fuckin friend for messin up with your girl. You would have done that if u had balls. Do you need 20 years to react? Allow me and i will punch him so hard in his chest and crush his sternum. LOSER

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   Answer by k — February 1, 2010

5. Hi brother,

   Sorry to hear about this incident. I can understand the pain and trauma you are going through. Now, many may feel my suggestion as stringent but I think this is the best for you.

   Firstly, have an open talk with your girlfriend about this incident. Talk about what happened exactly, and if she is really sorry for what she did. If she is, then you have to see to it that you completely trust her. Because if you don't trust her, it may prove fatal in the future. 

   Secondly, if you have given a promise to your girlfriend that you will not confront this to your "best friend" then you shouldn't confront it. But, seeing your "best friend's" behavior, I don't think he may be repentful for his act. My personal advice is that you shouldn't regard him as your friend anymore. That doesn't mean you have to have a fight with him or confront to him. Simply, move away from his life gradually. According to me, he is not worth to be called a friend.

   So, don't have a fight with anyone and move on with life. At the end of the day. think about this- "God punishes those who do the wrong deeds." You, my friend, haven't done anything wrong.

   Hope this helped you.

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   Answer by sam257 — February 1, 2010

6. Hi…
   According to me , u have a nice girl friend, at least she accept her fault and feeling guilty, for what she has done. See what i suggest is , you and your girl friend and your close friend and his wife, all four sit together discuss it , your friend's wife has full rights to know this matter, as you are. Your friend is married and he does have any rights to spoil her life. So all u four people sit together and discuss, and at that moment you tell what u dont like in your friend, like he visiting frequently ect keep the discussion fully transparent, and come to conclusion which not make any of u unhappy. If still it didnt go in ur way then move on.
   Talk and solve the problem, see in this preceptive, what would u have done when u standed  in his place. Men usually fall for girls, and sex, even knowing that they are married, or his friends GF or anything, all men needs one thing is SEX thats all.
    
   Good Luck 

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   Answer by Shamitha — February 1, 2010

7. The problems will occurs to good people only. I am sorry to say that a bad incident happened in ur life..
   Any ways i have to appreciate ur girl friend revealed her mistake. bcz she believes u and she hope u believe and forgive. So i would like to suggest u that, Think it was bad dream to both u and her. continue to love her. she is not cheater. she apolised regarding this na.
   Dont tell her " DONT DO THIS AGAIN"
   forgive her. Have nice life
   Keep Away with ur best – bitch  friend
   ALL IZZ WELL !!!!!!!! "jo hotha hai, wo accha hoge"
   Good luck brother

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   Answer by raj009 — February 1, 2010

8. dear ding,
              Well one thing is for sure you are in a terrible mesh in which according to me no one would ever want to be….
    
   friend i have read all the comments given to you and most of them are in favour of your girlfriend…. i also appreciate your girlfriend for her courage in telling the truth to you… she really loves you and you also loves you as have forgived your girlfriend for her mistake.
       
   but i want you ask you why you can not forgive your friend…?? see your friend and girlfriend are equally responsible for that incident the how can you you take side of your girlfriend want to teach a lesson to your friend only because your girlfriend have regretted for everything and not your friend??
                       you are taking your friend's natural behaviour as a proof of his sin?? friend he might also be disgusting himself for what he did to you but the only reason he is not telling that to you, may be that he don't want to lose you as his best friend as he might be expecting that you are not going to forgive him on any cost. And also he is a married guy so he may be looking forward for his marriage and do not want to risk it for what happened… i want to be clear that i m not taking your friend's side but i just want you to take a right decision so that you don't regret in later stage so just get to know about what actually happened that day?? so ask questions to your girlfriend about that day and then take a decision….
                        See some things just happen without anyone's intention… your girlfriend is regretting for what she did and so might be your friend the only thing is that he may not be as couragious as you girlfriend…
                       ask her whether he approached or she??? and also ask her whether he is approching again to your girlfriend again for that or he is also feeling guilty for what he did???
    
   You know both your girlfriend and your friend just get to know about the matter and don't do anything weird to teach him a lesson as in this way you will make things even more meshy…

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   Answer by sam003 — February 1, 2010

9. Such a sweet question with a cute situation. If happens in movies, huh? Read through the replies, here’s mine
   Its just a fuck, an one time fuck, thats all. What is there to be so upset about? We are not in your shoe, talking on kick him or forget her is easy for us, for you its not easy. So go ahead and do what cools you down. But dont forget, its your fantasy, she just made it happen. You are upset cause you werent there.
   I can tell what I would do. I wouldnt lose my best friend at any cost. I wouldnot lose my girlfriend too. And I wouldnot suffer for something I didnt do. I would go for my best friend’s wife, tell her upfront, ask for a revenge fuck and go back home. Later I would act the same way with my girlfriend and say sorry.
   Now the question is, if my friends wife doesnt agree to fuck. Well, a bit homework can solve that too. Make a recording of my girlfriends voice and confession with some key feature that his wife knows, such as his dicksize, positions, duration etc.
   Cheat a cheater is all right, I believe.

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   Answer by Oye … — February 1, 2010

10.  

    Hi Ding,

    Before I answer your question, let me say somethings. I carefully read all the previous answers and I am truly amazed at how strong and successful we are becoming as a community. Earlier it used to be the same silly one line questions and I used to play the know-it-all Godmother role. Reading the answers, I realised that there is nothing extra that I could add. Each of you have given amazingly mature personal points of view and all of you are justified in someway or the other. It is upto you Ding to decide which path to choose because you have several open in front of you.

    As I see there are two ways - 

    As hydspesial puts it, time is the best balm. Since the most important thing is that your girlfriend has confessed to you and you have forgiven her. You two love each other and life can just move on. You must have heard that the greatest revenge is to forgive your enemy. No good will come from wrecking your best friend's life. It is a valid point that you shouldn't just forgive one party and seek vengeance on the other. It is hypocritical of your friend to be completely unapologetic but there is a chance that he may be suffering from inside but is too afraid to tell you anything. Just forgive him from your side and let things be. Just be extra cautious of an encore.

    The other solution is the one most red blooded persons will take. Confront your best friend and wreck vengeance on his life. Either by directly confronting him and letting his wife know. Or even better, subtly indicating that you know the truth until he is psychologically forced to break down and confess to you. Your are better off without such a friend and slowly phase him out of your life.

    I wish you and your girlfriend all the best in life.

    -Anjali

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    Answer by Anjali — February 1, 2010

11. Hey Ding,
    If I would be in you place I would have just kicked my Girl friend and my boy frnd too. Why to stay with such type of girl who can get used with anyone. If she loves you really then she wouldn’t have done that. What do you think ? for what did she have sex ? Obviously she was not about to control and had sex for her enjoyment. Oh yeah after we loose energy we feel guilty, why have we done that. If you boy frnd would have been a unmarriedperson then I bet your girl friend would have broken with you on the next meet. So say your girl friend that you its not working. Fine. leave it. You might be having some speciallity(ex. money) so she stays with you and there is no other reason. And dont harm your boy friend and girl friend too. leave them alone. Let her learn a lesson at least. If she is a bad girl then she wont care for what you say.

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    Answer by Sid — February 2, 2010

12. I would say that open all the cards on the table and let everyone (incl. your friend’s wife) know about what has happened.

    I completely understand that your girlfriend had the courtesy to admit the guilt but I think that is her stupidity. Be Practical, she should have thought 1000 times before doing the act. If she hasn’t then it’s her problem and should not be your problem. I must say that you need to be mentally tough to do that, but then, this is how life is. I must admit that SEX is not just “THE THING” when it comes to settling down with that someone in life but I believe that whatever has to happen, should be either before you enter your girlfriend’s life or after you have gone out of her life. She has no right to cheat you by any means.

    I would suggest to have an meeting with open ended questions about this matter with everyone in the same room and then whatever has to happen will be totally dependent on the situation.

    I’m sure you’re mature enough to not pick up a fight (unless absolutely required in self defense) as it will only increase problems in your life and others too.

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    Answer by YS — February 2, 2010

13. well my friend i have also been in a sinilar situation in my past and i will advice u shud leave ur girlfriend and also your friend coz its really difficult for guys to forget their girlfriends past and i tell u you will find it really diffiult to trust her in future which will only destroy your relation morever she doesnt deserves to be trusted even if she has been honest i think just break up with her and move on maybe this gal is not the one for u GOD has made someone better for u.i know it will be hard for u but time heals the worse wounds of life.make a fresh start with someone better coz u never cheated yaar and u deserve better.i know u have a soft corner for ur gf but its ur life so take a mature decision.best of luck dude

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    Answer by prashant — February 2, 2010

14. dude…time to say good bye to ur best friend…..
    forgive ur gal, but not ur friend…….
    u dont have to break his marriage……but walk away from that friendship after letting him know why u r doing that!
    and tell ur gal not to continue her friendship with him too, if she wants to stay in the relationship with you!!!!!!!
    there is something called selfrespect, man….

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    Answer by ram — February 2, 2010

15. Hi Brother,
    I am really sorry to hear the moment you going through,
    Your GF State,
    If she had the true love in you, she would not even thought such thing but she accepted to sleep with your best friend which is a big mistake. Allrite now as she did it, she could have easily hide it with you but she told to you which is good. As she confused she really felt guilt for doing such a thing I would say she deserves forgiveness.
    Your Best Friend State,
    First how could any friend do such a back sliding such as this, he know dat she is your girl friend.
    Two Cases:
    1> Your GF may tempted ur friend to have sex( sorry friend to point all this here i just want to split into chances and see what best we can do )
    2> Your BestF tempted her to have sex
    3>Both were not in control may be they were in liquior
    well in all de cases if he is really a true friend even when Case 1 is true he should avoided this.
    Your Best Friend is not your best friend anymore and he hided as well so he doesnt deserve any forgiveness, you should take him out from ur circle first
    Now Your State:
    Before moving into any other things ask yourself.
    1> Did you ever slept with any other girl before?
    2> If you are in friend's place did you ever do this kind of stuff.
    Dear friend, I want to tell that girl feelings can be easily tempted and they have more sensual feeling than guy. if you already slept with any other girl i should say FORGIVE her and avoid ur best friend from life.
    Now, As you already slept with your girl friend if you leave her, then she will have real hard time coming out of life. she will be hurted and could lead her life in real bad state. This case is complicated, when i ask from heart i would say a girl when she agree that she slept with another guy and says to you ..it proves her love towards you is strong. Be with her spend time and talk forget the inccident which happened you can easliy recongnize that she is same before..then you can decide. take your time. Best of luck.

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    Answer by Wellwisher — February 2, 2010

16. have very dirty sex with her and video tape it. upload the video on our website.

    send teasers over to her as well.

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    Answer by cuntlessdick — February 2, 2010

17. Before you do anything about your girlfriend, you should get your best friend out of your life. Only friends stabs you in the back. As for revenge, let his wife know about the truth. I know many has explained above that only time can heal you but if you keep your friend, you can never trust him. Don't use violence because he didn't use violence to hurt you so use your brain.

    About your girlfriend, how could you trust her after this. I know you told about fantasies but she should of done it with your consent. Its cheating when you didn't know about it. If she cheated you when you were nearby, think about it when you leave on a business trip or something. Its upto you keep going with her or breaking up but this is my views. I don't know much about her character so I can't judge her fully to give you a verdict. But about your friend, I don't care what his character is or not; that fucker broke the friendship the moment he decide to fuck your girlfriend.

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    Answer by sivamdavid — February 2, 2010

18. Hi my friend,
    I feel really sorry for you.
    If I were you, I would have confronted my friend and cut him out of my life. He has taken advantage of you and friends never sleep with other friends wife.. I would have told it to his wife also..but its not good to break someones marriage

    With the girl, even though she admitted it, I dont know if I would be able to accept her and MOVE on with it.
    It is one thing to forgive and other thing to forget. I would have forgiven her but could not accept her in my life as a a wife and would have left her. I could no longer be normal with her.
    She has done a huge blunder, even she must be suffering. Her greatest punishment would be living with herself (If she has a heart). Even though she is messed up I feel bad for her.
    Dont be emotional buddy and think practically !!!
    Finally its what you want and the choices that you want to make.
    Have a good life !

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    Answer by Decent Guy — February 2, 2010

19. Well pal..
    I Seriously believe tht you should wreck your SO CALLED best friend's fkin life. He deserves to…even if it was your Gf's fault he could hv kept his calm and realised tht sleeping wid ur gf wud be a mistake.! SO be ea man and screw his life…as he screwed yours!  
     
    And for the GF part. Dude that girl cnt be trusted anymore…i know that would really hurt you a lot . but leave her the fk alone.
    Living with her for the rest of your life with this thought that she betrayed your love…wont be just easy and acceptable.
    So jus say her goodbye and move on…. You will find someone better.. Love's just a lame emotion when things like this happpen. act brainy… get rid of both! You dnt wana keep yourself surrounded with such people.
    And take it as a lesson in your life!
    All the best!
    TIME IS THE BEST HEALER!

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    Answer by kid — February 2, 2010

20. I think you should not forgive your friend and your girlfriend, this is like stabbing someone from behind , talk to your friend and let him know that you know about it and how you feel about it,I don't think you need a friend like this and about your girlfriend give her one more chance if you  really love her but if  you have any doubt and cannot forgive her then leave her also and in the end if you really want peace with your mind tell your friends wife about it let her also know how her husband broke your friendship

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    Answer by babal — February 2, 2010

21. Mate,
     
    I don''t know what others feel and why, if I am in your shoes… I will kept quite for a while, when G-fnd confess it and observes both parties. Because you love both of them and dont want to lose.

    if ur frnd is dishonest being in touch with and not telling the truth.you should make him realize what he has done to you.If you are thinking about your frnd and G frnd in positive way and taking them for granted, dont they have need to have same feelings, loyality towards you. If you really wants to teach ur frnd a lesson, then go to his wife and offer a having sex with you and if she agrees then account is nil and if she disagrees , says that she is your frnds wife then let her know that Then Y fuck his frnd screwed ur G frnd, Y he betrayed not only U and me too.
    U dont need crap in ur life , mate…. Love is Blind not deaf, listen to urself and to ur mind…. wake up

    You g-frnd (Savita Bhabhi) played her part, she tastes two dick and she is back to pavilion aftr realsing that 2nd dick is commited and would not last long as it belongs to some one else too. So she can or might use this option later in future.
     
    Every one has some principles in life, dont break it when some betray you… Its KALYUG, dnt try to Harish Chandra … or otherwise( SAVITA BHABHI) ur g frnd gona be ……XXXXX
    Good Luck with ur decision,
     

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    Answer by the100rub — February 2, 2010

22. Mate,
     
    I don''t know what others feel and why, if I am in your shoes… I will kept quite for a while, when G-fnd confess it and observes both parties. Because you love both of them and dont want to lose.

    if ur frnd is dishonest even  being in touch, not telling the truth.you should make him realize what he has done to you.If you are thinking about your frnd and G frnd in positive way and taking them for granted, dont they have need to have same feelings, loyality towards you. If you really wants to teach ur frnd a lesson, then go to his wife and offer a having sex with you and if she agrees then account is nil and if she disagrees….says that she is your frnds wife ….blah blah then let her know that  Y his husband screwed ur G frnd, Y he betrayed not only U and me too.
    U dont need crap in ur life , mate…. Love is Blind not deaf, listen to urself and to ur mind…. wake up

    You g-frnd (Savita Bhabhi) played her part, she tastes two dick and she is back to pavilion aftr realsing that 2nd dick is commited and would not last long as it belongs to some one else too.  she can or might use this option later in future, when u r not watching..
     
    This mite not happen but it can be as both are open to each other after having you in confidence
     
    Every one has some principles in life, dont break it when some betray you… Its KALYUG, dnt try to Harish Chandra … or otherwise( SAVITA BHABHI) ur g frnd gona be ……XXXXX
    Good Luck with ur decision,
     

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    Answer by the100rub — February 2, 2010

23. Hi Friend,
     
    Sorry for the sorrow thing happened in you life.
    one thing is clear, as on today you may forgive your girl friend, you may marry her, but the thing which was happened will be in you mind through out your life and you will be suspecting her through out the life.
    By this nether you nor you girl turned wife will not be happy.
    As a man if u compromise also, that incident will be their in your mind for life time.
    I suggest you to have a good break up, so that both will be happy.
    Sorry if i am wrong
     
    Pav

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    Answer by Pavan — February 2, 2010

24. hi bro,
    this is the first tym dat i m answering any question..i read all the questions n answers n enjoy that but ur problem is sumthing i thought i should give somthin more if it cud help…i know one person from my engineering days who faced a similar dillemma when we used to live together…his friend also cheated him n his girlfriend also confessed everything to him…he broke up with his gf n tried to avoid that friend too but they used to meet sum way as we all are common friends n very few new about this incident…so everytime he met that friend his bruises got uncovered…his galfrnd after 4 months found a new boyfriend and this hurt him very badly and this affected his studies and job too in later years…he still can't trust any girl or any relationship and always feel negative about love…
     
    this was a real example for u..n u can take out ur own inferences out of it…but i will suggest that first try to discuss in detail about that incident and that fuckin tym when ur galfrnd got so passionate that she forgot about u and ur relationship…if she is so immmature n can do this one tym..than i dont think u can trust her in future too..especially if she can allow ur best friend to fuck her than what is the risk in sleeping with sumone u dont know…go into this deeer this is not sumthin to take lightly…
    beat the hell outta ur friend coz if u live wid ur gal or not he tried to betray u n u cannot trust him anyway in future…
    all the best in lyf..

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    Answer by Amol — February 2, 2010

25. Well dear,
    Everyone have said all the possible angles. Anyways once a trust in broken…it never comes back. Someday, sometime in your life… if you are still with this girl things could turn really bad. You can take it for granted. 
    My advice would be break up with your girlfriend. Tell her straight.. before that teach your best friend a lesson dude… put all your hardwork in seducing his wife… its not just able looks… make her fall some how… fuck her and then confess to your best friend for what happened. 
    You can even let his wife know that he cannot be trusted… something dude… use your brains…. get some help and ideas. Remember his wife will be always close to him and will believe him first. So make your moves perfect. 
    Leave all three (dont keep fucking his wife forever or marry her)… forget the past… get a new girl, get a new life. Life is a long way and not all girls are bad… moreover you deserves someone better!

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    Answer by Maxblack — February 2, 2010

26. hey there,
     
    sorry to hear about what happened.
    I think this is a terrible situation. I would like to suggest you to forget your gf and your friend too. The reason is very simple; they both betrayed you. I guess once they cheat on you they never stop. your girl asked for forgiveness but how can she prove that she will not sleep with the same guy again or anybody else?
     
    be strong and dump your stupid girl.

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    Answer by fallen-angel — February 2, 2010

27. hello ding dear,
     
    I am feeling bad for you. actually i am a male escort and have slept with a a lot of girls. I am very professional in my work and never ask any lady why they prefer escorts? Sometimes they prefer to talk to me and tell me the reason behind. Most of the ladies who talked said it is for sexual satisfaction. Therefore it is important to know if she fell in love or is it because she is not satisfied.
    Now all I can do is to donate some points to you so that you will calm and get something from AA store to enjoy.
    Good luck!
     
     

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    Answer by male-whore — February 2, 2010

28. Hello Ding,
    It would be quite noble if you frogive and take her. However, please note, this will come to haunt you time and again even after many years… My advice, just part as friends and find some one. You will save your self tons of worries  later on. Your " love" for this  girlfirend will be soon forgotten
     
    Move on with you life buddy,

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    Answer by elder — February 2, 2010

29. Hi Buddy,
     
      Feeling for the incident which happend is not going to fetch you anything. And if you are a person who take hasty decision you might've not asked this question in the forum rather than punishing them. You may think that its easy to say forget, yes i do agree its hard to digest which is worser than a death. Cos i've came across the same situation. You believe it or not, i dint ask a question to my girl or to my friend from the day she told me as your girl told. Not later than 6 months my friend was in a crisis and he knelt down infront of me for his mistake. Do not be in a place where your friend is reachable. Just ignore him, and he will feel for what he had done, if he is really a true friend of yours. ..
     
         Cheers and keep going
     
    Regards,
    Edwin
    edydaretodo@aol.com

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    Answer by Edwin — February 3, 2010

30. Hey bro ,
    I have read all the above comments and I personally feel that I will get a hell lot of negative points on the comment I am going make …But believe me buddy its true its damn true …
     
    Let me tell u one thing …A guy cant force any gal to have sex with him unless the gal supports him otherwise it will be considered as rape …If ur best pal raped ur gal friend , then u can take revenge on ur friend by kicking his ass in the street …

    But ur gal friend allowed him to play with her ….So she is responsible for everything ..and now she is playing safe by revealing the story and she feels sorry for it now ….Wat surety is there that she wont make this mistake again in her life …If she truly loved u then she wont ever allow this impurity and perhaps she is not satisfied with u ….Wat kind of asshole u r …u fantasize ur gal friend having sex with that dude during ur sex ….U deserve this man …..Be a man first then u can handle women ….Thats the reason ur gal ran away with ur best pal …And then came back to u as she knows very well that u r a looser and u wont do anything and will accept her again as ur gal friend ….Grow up man ……Grow up …
     
    Lead a new life …Kick both of them from ur life ….no need to hurt anyone …Just forget abt them and start a fresh new life and this event as a bloody lesson and move on brother …U will be happy in future ….Otherwise this event will eat u up till rest of ur life ….I am 100% sure that u will fall in love again and will love her like hell that she wont have any doubt abt ur commitment to her ….Start a healthy life ….Wish ya all the luck buddy …..
     

    Regards ,
     
    Zor

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    Answer by zorfabio — February 3, 2010

31. Hello friend,
    Everyone out here will leave you two choices :- to forgive her or to leave her and have your revenge.
    Every movie we see and every story that we hear says either of these.
    And those are the two choices for any ordinary man since the beginning of human race
    But I would like to show you a sneak peak of the extent of things that you can do which are much more ‘unconventional’
    First of all try to understand why we all feel bad when someone else does sex with our love/life partner.
    Most of us think it’s a human only emotion, but actually the feeling is there with many animal/bird species too.
    The urge to do sex is to make sure that we donot end up our life without creating our offsprings.
    Nature wants Every one create their offsprings to make sure that the diversity in the species is maintained.
    There are birds those helps the female to make the nest, and feed the female when she is hatching the eggs and also helps to bring the little birds up. But during the mating season, if the male bird finds the female bird mating with any other female bird, the male bird just flies away and the female will have to do everything with no help.
    Females have the urge do the polygamy thing(mating with several males) to make sure that she is investing her time and effort to reproduce the best offspring, since she cant do it as often as males.
    For males, they want to mate with as many females as possible to make sure that their offsprings are produced. They dont have to check the quality. A man can be father of may be a 50000 kids [ average 3 matings per day, all fruitful, from that age of 15 to 65 - he must be the luckiest man on earth ] But a woman can only go thruogh the process of delivering babies something like 20 times and thus a theoritical maximum of 60 kids if everytime she had triplets Thats why woman do not want to fuck around with any and every man. No one does this with their knowledge. But it is this sexual evolutionary psychology that leads every human being and animals on this planet.
    Once you clearly understand what psychology is driving you (also your friend and your gf), it is easy to get over it.
    Now about what you can do about it. You can do many things
    No that she has confessed and she is having the guilty feeling in her, she will be ready to do anything for you for the rest of her life, if you carefully make sure that she never gets over the guilt.
    And you can make your friend know that you know the ‘terrible’ thing he done to you and you have the weapons of guilt and making his wife know about it.
    Means you have two people at your disposal, whom you can control and make them do anything for you. With the right tactics of course. It is you to decide what to do with them. With the right amount of pressure and leverage, you can make them do just anything. for example If a man with a lot of sexual urge gets this situation, he may make her girlfriend to seduce other girls for her, may be make take videos of other girls in changing rooms or toilets or whatever, arrange another picnic trip, force the friend guy to arrange a sex with his wife, threesome, foursome…. the possibilities are infinite
    And for the readers who feels a terribly wrong feeling about these,
    Its the primitive cerebrum trying to oppose a huge change in your attitude.
    I promise you will start feeling right gradually…
    Best of Luck

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    Answer by UnCummable — February 3, 2010

32. hi
    bro
    from ur point u want to teach him a lesson so :
    1. fuck his friendship
    2. tell his wife(she as to know his true color)
    3. tell the bitch girl friend(its over ) and brake off with her
    4. do this if you are a man
    5. or go fuck is wife _

    this all counts if u have the ball’s 00 to do so or love her and be a ass while he fucks ur girl later make a point it will never stop

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    Answer by ghost — February 3, 2010

33. Hahah… you know what happended exactly??????
    
    
    
    your friend blackmailing your GF, so she said the incident before your friend say to you.. your FG is defnetly cheating you She is a whore… sorry to say you that…
    

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    Answer by Kiri — February 3, 2010

34. hello friend,
    If you want to really take the revenge.. then you have two options either you go and tell him & his wife together or you go n seduce his wife..
    If you want to keep your g/f n forget all what has happened then you just continue with the relationship and make her so much happy that she should not feel in need of taking on another man and just leave your friend without any reason and continue with your life.

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    Answer by ishan — February 4, 2010

35. who can say when u will b not around her some others will not take chance?caz ur gf cant hold her even wid ur best frnd.its very easy for her to hide some more relations,who all are unknown to u.plz bro just leave her.and yes teach a lesson to your friend too.tel all things in front of his wife,so that his wife comes to know about his attitude.
     

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    Answer by ochena — February 4, 2010

36. if your firend have a girl friend so you slep with his g.f…
    its very simple….
    if he dot have you beat them and cool down..
    and also consert with you g.f  why she sleep with his friend …

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    Answer by him221989 — February 4, 2010

37. 
    The same goes here….

    Ding is participating here, why there is no reply after all these people put together their time on replyng the question?

    If this is not a real situation, a questioner sure can give a declaration.  No point to make a story and spoil other people's time with a sentimental question.

    I saw some people wrote in some places that Anjali and Editors are making up all the questions to make it juicy.  Being one of your first knights to help as working editors, I can vow that the Editors are not making any question, its editing all outside question.  To prove neutrality, please take the first step, dont assign any Bonus AA$ on any featured question if the questioner dont give any input.

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    Answer by Oye … — February 5, 2010

38. dude,
    listen we r men n its damn easy to say that lets give our relation a new beginning n lets giv ur girlfrd a chance bt u can never forget wt ur grlfrd did wid u…..coz we r men n is in our blood…
    being frank i see u no where if u be wid ur grlfrd anymore coz if ur bst frd seduced her thn any man can do that again n if she seduced ur bst frd thn any man can be lucky to get ur grlfrd on bed…..n hn in future u ll b licking on diff answers here again to get out of the situation……
    time is BALM but dude u had a severe accident u dnt need BALM u need an operation…..SO NW FIX URSELF TELL UR GRLFRD BYE N THROW UR BSTFRD ON SOME HOSPITAL BED N GET SOME GIRL FOR U….

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    Answer by sid — February 6, 2010

39. Dear Anjali Aunty and Friends,

    Sorry for responding late. Finally it is Sunday.

    Thank you for your kind suggestions.

    In a way I found out that the more suggestions I got the more reluctant I got to make a straight decision or replying the suggestions- I was in deeper confusion.

    As I read the suggestions I realized that I have been misunderstood and perhaps the editors have modified by question in a little provocative way. I want to make it clear that I never asked for any revenge in my question. The only problem I was having is to behave as a calm person in of my friend after all these incidents. I have already made up my mind to forgive my girl and I was not sure how to handle the encounters with my friend – to control my hatred towards him.

    I was suggested to forget my best- friend by most of the respondents. Therefore I decided to stop my friendship with him without further explaining to him. It was a hard decision but I had to do it in order to move ahead. I also went to meditation program for 7 days and therefore I was not really able to respond to suggestions from my side.

    I would like to express my rage against “OYE” as I found that he is either a smart guy or a person who is pretending to be really smart. I couldn’t really understand why he has to be bothered by originality of the question and make assumptions that people do it just to get AA $. It was ridiculous to hear that he has been accusing the persons who do not response the suggestions as a culprit person only after AA $.

    I would like to ask “OYE”; how do you suppose a person to answer each and every reply when in fact he is much in deeper thoughts? Don’t you think replying each answers would rather not let us earn more AA $? I got 37 responses and imagine I would reply each individually! How much would it be? Furthermore, people are busy with their lives as I assume most of us are also engaged in professions for living.

    Similarly, Ask Anjali I am in favor of letting people ask any queries they have in their mind; there should not be strict rule as such to publish the question because the more person visits your site the better it would be. “OYE” if you think you have the best English amongst all the people and a good capability to work as an editor then it would be better to utilize in something good. I guess you should stop criticizing and just merely running after originality of the question.

    Enjoy your editorship and stop being mean to others. If you don’t like any questions and feel like not answering it; just skip it.

    Regards

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    Answer by ding — February 7, 2010

40. @ding, Cool down Ding. Read my replies once again.
    Nope, I dont have the best English, but sure I can read between lines, faster than anyone. And before understand the meaning, I dont react.
    Recently I was going through my wife’s Cosmo collections. I am amazed to see a number of questions are picked from there. Check back randomly with AA questions I found a number of peiple ask question, and never get back.
    Back to your situation, yeah seemed filmy to me, yet I replied what I would have done. I wouldnot lose my friend, nor my girl, and wont suffer. So only option is eye for an eye, a revenge sex.
    Second part is related to why people dont reply back. I didnt know your 7 days self exile. I was expecting a reply, not reply against each and everyone individually.
    If I could explain myself, do inform. If I couldnot, well, am not going to try again.
    And I am not working editor for this month, I am not editing question, only some lousy answers I am deleting. That doesnt make me an editor.
    Have a nice day, keep in touch, if you think my replies are hard to digest, I will delete those, just to make you happy.
    Oye …

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    Answer by Oye … — February 7, 2010

41. @ "OYE" I am cool.
    I am okay with your good suggestions on whatever my query was. It was in fact a good suggestion from your side. I have decided after analysizng answers from everyone and talking to my girl friend. I am going to keep her but leave my friend.
    I expressed my anger towards your idea of calling every other person not answer as fake.  There are millions of people in the world. Don't you think there are multiple chances of people having similar type of problem? I am not saying everyone is genuine here but it is very hard to know who is the real one. Therefore it will be much appreciated if we disregard this issue. I have read Anjali Aunty's answer when someone asked how many times and what types of questions we are allowed to ask. Aunty has said we can ask varieties of questions. My friend it will be a boring site if only you start considering one or two so called genuine questions.
    We appreciate your work in Ask Anjali. Enjoy your work! Good luck!
     
    Regards

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    Answer by ding — February 7, 2010

42. Well what do you do? fuck his wife.
     
    i had a best friend too and he had a european girlfriend we used to go out every now and then .
    My friend left to india for  vacation his girlfriend used to come to my condo almost everyday , first i thought it was like a friend but sooner i found a change in her attitude, she was asking me all questions then one day she came and kissed me i got a hard on but  thanks my moral upbringing i remembered my best friend and stopped her.
    even now she remembers me for being strong willed cos i cared more about friendship than pussy.
    well your best friend you say doesn't have strong will sorry to say.
    you should break your friendship with ur best friend and tell him to stay away from ur girl( if you want to take her back).
    also you can tell his wife about it as  his innocent wife doesn't know what her husband is upto.
    today it was your girl tomorrow it could be someones.
    time to put an end to it.
    "IF you want revenge go tell his wife about it".
    if you dont want revenge then don't expect your friend and girl to stay the same either break with ur girl or break ur best friendship.
     
     
    "This is a pitfall of having best friends without good moral upbringing and letting them mingle with your wives/girlfriends etc.".
    You will never know when someone gets attracted.
    have your friends but maintain a distance after you get married.

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    Answer by dr.wolf — February 7, 2010

43. Friend, Just leave both of them and get yourself free from this complex situation. If you have forgiven your girl right now even, this stupid incident will again and again come between you and create problem in future. You should leave her and find another trustworthy life partner.

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    Answer by Alok — February 7, 2010

44. another suggesstion, video tape YOUR girlfriend’s sex sessions with YOUR best friend. Learn from your boy friend who he fucks your women. apply the principle on others you loser.

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    Answer by cuntlessdick — February 10, 2010

45. Hii friend …
    No one can feel what is going through in your life .A person who gets hurt can only know the pain he/she is going through.
    1.I appreciate ur GF that she told u the truth.reason behind it can be
    (a.)She truly LOVES you and she regret in what she has done
    (b.)Fear of loosing you.If you come to know about it from some one else(your friend) or it was a do or die situation for her she may tell the truth and except what ever happens.
    (c.)talking about ur friend he may be regreting but but thing about the hatred that u will show to him he may not tell you
    (D) he would also have the fear that if you tell it to his wife and his life becomes a mess .
    (e) he is a flirter so he does not regret so he behaves normal.as he is ur best friend u know his nature better.
    BUT…….
    2. My que to you would be what do you want to prove by teaching him a lesson?can you change what ever happened.?suppose you did some thing to teach him a lesson and the situation become worse.his family life falls in to a trouble.Your GF who is with you may leave you .
    Friend you will loss what you have right now.Except what has happened and think what was that she found in your friend and it was lacking in you.Try to improve that in you life which can strengthen your relation which can help you in ur further life .
    Revenge never solves any problems.it only creates more problems.The victim can be you or the opponent or both.
    Its easy to say but nothing is impossible.
    Best of luck.
    Keep smiling.

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    Answer by jo fernandus — February 14, 2010

46. My fellow well wishers,
     
    As mentioned already, I have accpeted my GF. I have kept her with me because we both love eachother very much. I have forgiven her.
     
    I never looked for any revenge against my so called friend. I have simply stopped my freindship with him. I guess due to my act now he also knows that I came across the hidden facts. I hope everythign will be good in future.
     
     
    Thank you all once again.

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    Answer by ding — February 16, 2010

47. i am really sorry for this incident , as i will know how it feels if it happened to me , trust me i knw the feeeling  :) 
    this life is full of persons with different deifferent kind of bonds with thers , sm bonds are made to be true , some bonds are mendable , some bonds are juz like chewing gum  
    I'll tel u one thing my dear frnd , its not all ur best frnds fault that he had sex with ur wife ,bt obviously everone knows that men need some seducing too . so as i tink even though u love her with all ur heart , with all ur life , juz let her go …………………………………..she will cry nw sayng sorry  , shel be okay after few weeks , maybe she wont d it again , bt she will hv the filthy mnd , dat wont go nywher , and who knws as time goes by she might need it again
    As for , il tel u waht i wil do , 1)listen to ur wife sad story abt her cheating on u with ur best frnd , 2) give her a fucking slap which includes all the pain in ur heart ?does she knw hw it feels , the burning sensation in the midddle of ur chest ? the feeling as if the whole world is gng down on u ? i mean if u trutly did love her? ur heart goes into ashes right belv me i knw , even strong men cry over these things , 3) ask her to let u go , tel her to take her own path in life and even though u love her , u cannot be wih her anymore because the thoughts will be coming into mind over n over again … 
    IF i was in ur situation , i would tel her all the things insde my heart which is good n against her , tel her how u wish to go back to the past n be as a normal couple , cry if u want to : dats how u can make her regret . 
    and as for urbest frnd , i will smash his head with a sladge hammer , bt thats just me , dont go on tyring to breakup their marriage , he wil get his punishment ,  waht goes around comes around ……… tc 

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    Answer by Ben — March 4, 2010

48. Hello Brother,
                             I feel really sorry for u and its an unfortunate event that took place. Maybe i do not realise how tough it is for u but i do know this incident will make u feel all the pain in this world. First of all i really appreciate that u have kept yourself calm after hearing the incident.
                             Now my friend let me come to the point. It is good that your girlfriend has admitted that she has done something disastrous but the fact remains that if she can do it once with another guy she can do the same at some later point of time. no use blaming your friend for this as men are dogs but i really feel that you should break up with her and find someone who is more loyal because this incident is going to bother you your entire life, so its better if you 2 part and that will make you my friend more happy.
                              Wishing you all the best for your future. Its your life, make your own decision, i just gave a suggestion, rest is up to you. Cheers!!!

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    Answer by Bbreathe — March 8, 2010

49. "Best Way to Punish someone is to Forgive him Without Telling anything."
    Move away from your friend….Give another thought about your Girl friend !
    If you find her OK Move on else…..Life will move you ….. 
    It is always difficult to eat something if you have seen that thing has been contaminated during or before serving.
    but there could be no harm in eating it….So If you thing that you can forget what your GF did …Go ahead
    and remember that God has granted,  we human to forget the things though it may take some time !
    Gud Luk

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    Answer by JA — March 10, 2010

50. dude i m really sorry for u.
    i will say u should ask about u r best frnd about the incident with calm. u knew only one side lets check it out both sides. there is no point by hiding it from u r frnd . ask him him now. may be u r approach to this incident will be totally different. post his reply too.. u will get more choices then
    i believe GF and Best Frnd should be equal to you. y didn't you ask him yet?? if he is u r best frnd??
    close the chapter as soon as possible ,otherwise u will suffer 
    best wishes..

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    Answer by romy — March 13, 2010

51. Its the cheating that upsets but its ok. Now that U know, U can confront yr friend and can have threesomes and if his wife is ok, even foursomes.

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    Answer by Anjali — March 18, 2010

52. Dear,
    i think, u shud take watever has happened as an experience of your life.
    i m sure after some years ( if u r are with ur gf or not ) u ll realise that this situation has made u a stronger man.
     
    there are only 2 ways things could be after this.
    1. u stay with your girl- pardon her-  
    not very good initially, as u ll tend to get frustrated and react to smaller issues. in the process, ur gf will start feeling loss of self esteem. which takes ur relationship nowhere. but with passage of time, if u r able to carry on ur relationship, u ll find that time heals everything. also ur girl will be making that extra effort to make u happy, which she might not have done if the given instance dint happen. in the process u ll realise, that the instance was not end of this world, and such things do happen. i believe u wud have also at some point been unloyal to ur partner ( 95%  of men are ) only 5% admit. so let it be and live happily ever after. just make sure, u dont vent ur anger too much or in silly ways. self respect of a woman is very important for her existance. try not to subjugate ur woman too much. she has every right in this world to live a respectful life.
    2. u leave ur girl move on - 
    though it looks easy to do, but believe me, if u love each other, its the hardest thing to do.
    however assuming u leave ur girl. u ll notice the emotional changes that u discover in urself. u ll find that u re no longer dependant on anybody. there is no guilt involved in anything you do. love freindship take a backseat, and depending upon u, other things like professional wisdom, fun, or serial dating may occur. u ll find urself very confident, and will know exactly wat you want in the life the most. its a given fact that the second fruitfull relationship always works better. 
    adding another side to this, u can treat this an excuse to switch partners, people hardly get a chance to move out of a serious relationship. although every man is polygamous by nature. this might give u a chance to try many partners in ur life, and never again in ur life will u regret bieng with a sngle partner, and not trying anything else that was around.
     
    p.s – take this as an opportunity, believe me such things happen with special people, to make them stronger in life. take anybody, real people have unreal stories & plain simple life is so boring.
    the biggest fault of ur GF, is to tell u wat she did.  take a lesson, some things are better untold. she would have been happy, u wud have been happier.
     
    dude such a long reply : phew

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    Answer by anonymous architect — March 27, 2010

53. Hello,
    It's also important to be strong in front of your girlfriend. You need to make her, make it up to you, you know? If you love her and forgive her too easily, she'll never respect you.
    One condition is that she never contacts your best friend again. Another is that she needs to show you (not tell, SHOW) how much you mean to her.
    It's also important for you to confront your friend about this. You shouldn't publicly humiliate him, tell anyone else, especially his wife. But you should give him a chance to say what happened, and if he denies it, you can have your girlfriend there to corroborate the story. You should then end your friendship with him and never speak with him again. There's no way you'll know if he does something like this again.

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    Answer by Ryan — April 17, 2010

54. u have forgiven ur gf thats good… but if i was at ur place may be i would have forgiven my gf for this.
    but not my best friend? i would have silently threw him from my life….
    may be ur fren never valued ur friendship and its bond.
    shame on him.

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    Answer by Acid — April 21, 2010

55. Same has happened with me also. In my case my gf had sex with her sister's fiancee 3-4 times (she knew him from college days) before he married with her sister (love mariage). It was just for pleasure. After his marriage, he still keeps trying to get her but now she completely avoids him.
    
    But I still feel extremely bad that she went to that level just for pleasure which I feel is very cheap. Again the thing that hurts me most is I'm not the one with whom she had her life's first sex. For me it is/was very important that I should be the first and last person whom my gf/wife had sex.
    
    
    But you know life is never the way we want it to be. Now soon I'm going to marry my gf.
    
    Before taking this decision I thought of 2 things
    
    1. Do I feel my girl can cheat me further after marriage? - No, she has learned a lesson
    
    2. Do I feel she truely loves me? Yes
    
    The choice is simple, I had to forgive her. Yes there is a minor chance that she can do same thing after marring with me. But marriage is always about trust. If you are not ready to get hurt then probably you are not ready for love too.
    

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    Answer by Jayzee — May 18, 2010

56. R u really a man?u still reffer 2 him s ur "best"frnd?fuck u man!!!!1st it is da fault of ur girl……she wanted to sleep wid him!!!!if she had oposed who da hell in dis world'd dare touch her!!!!IF u r a man u might kno da fact dat even if some times u get such a chance wid ur so called best frnds wife wont u hv fucked her!!!!hav u nevr looked at her boobs?so dont giv me da bechari ladki crap…..even i went through such a condition…..n made da girl repent 4 her deed to da fullest….n nw she is on da right path……!!!!if u dont say nything to her nw…..a time'll come she 'll do dis again n say sorry 2 u!!!!but den it'd hav been 2 late 4 u 2 do something about it!!!!!
                     TEACH HER A LESSON…..OR ELSE GET READY 2 SEE ALL UR OTHER "BEST" FRNDS SLEEP WID HER……
    best of luck……tk cr

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    Answer by anupam — May 19, 2010

57. mate one thing i have to tell u that relationships are made on trusts,,
    
    if you trusts and have faith on your girlfriend neither GOD can snatch away ur girlfriend that is called love.

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    Answer by comeondeepak_1991 — May 27, 2010

58. sabse pehle apni girlfriend se breakup kar le. aisa pyar kis kam ka. aaj tere friend ke saath kiya hai kal pata nahi kis-kis ke saath karegi. pimp ban kar reh jayega. izzzat utar jaygi. koi nayi dhoondh le .  kyo ek characterless second hand item ke piche apani life kharab kar raha hai

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    Answer by sonchi — June 7, 2010

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