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Should I marry my cousin bro? I have separated from my husband

3.1K views
asked 6 days ago in Questions by Seema18041989 (120 points)
Hello all,

I wish a number of people will give me suggestion which will be fruitful for my life.

First, Let me tell you about myself.  I am a 34-year-old female. I was in love with someone and because of this my family left me and I married him.

After some time of marriage, I found he has another female friend and mutually we live separately now.  Our marriage was only for two months.

Now i am alone. No family is with me but only my cousin brother who is 30 years old helped me. I live with him we two live and do work together.

I am totally dependant on him and he loves me more and takes care of me. I go with him in pub outing and sometimes he kisses me and hug me and we share the same bed at night..

Now he proposed me to marry him.. Now i m confused whether i should go for marriage with him or not.

I know he loves me very much. he obeys me every time. Internally i also love him..

Should i go for marriage. Pls help me.



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11 Answers

0 like 0 dislike
Hello seema,

Welcome to ask anjali. Coming to your question you had said, you both are mutually living separately. Does this mean you both got divorced ? If yes, then there will not be any problem in marrying your cousin. But if you are planning for a child with your cousin, I have heard there will be some defect or abnormal conditions with the baby. I'm not sure about this. Someone might give a clear idea about that. Your might feel like betrayed because of your first love. Take your own time and come to a point whether your cousin is trust worthy or not. What, if your cousin just planning to use you for his sexual pleasure ?
answered 6 days ago by deepu1996 (385 points)
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Hi Seema  !

Now please don't take it wrong but as you mentioned that you married against your parents wishes, so whats stopping you this time?

I guess your family still hasn't reconciled with you and you're living separately from your husband, so have you divorced your husband or are you still in the process ? You say you're dependent on your cousin but in this modern age one shouldn't be dependent on anyone no matter how trustworthy you think they are.

Here are some points you should consider before you think about marriage.

1. Get divorce from your husband and most importantly get deserved alimony from him which is your right since he's the reason your marriage failed.
2. Try to get a job, try to be independent (at least financially if not emotionally).
3. Have a heart to heart talk with your cousin regarding what you feel and what he expects from you, since you have already suffered a broken marriage, your every step is very important.
4. I don't know to which religion you belong but the reason why I mentioned religion is because in some religion marriage between cousins are okay but in some it is considered a taboo. So if yours allow it, then go ahead but if not then you have to think how are you going to deal with the society and most importantly your cousin's family.

And last but not the least, can you trust your cousin ? Are you sure he is willing to commit to you and won't leave you stranded like your ex husband ??? Take all these factors into account and most importantly take your time to decide. ALL THE BEST FOR YOU FUTURE LIFE  !
answered 6 days ago by gr8gaur (2,400 points)
commented 4 days ago by Seema18041989 (120 points)
i got divorce from husband. i work with my cousin and financialy not depenednet on him.. my inner feeling also love him. as u told he want me only for sex, i answered this taht he told me that he love me a lot he have feeling also for me and he clear also that 80% he have good feeling for me and 20% he truly say that he want sex with me.. its normal for man
0 like 0 dislike
Hi Seema age's just a NO: you can go ahead but if you don't know if it's just lust from his end then you are @ trouble for the 2nd time remember as yo told yo've got separated from your family also if they come to know this & by the this also in-case doesn't work yo'll be in a deep trouble. Think it over if it's just lust then go ahead & have sex if yo wanna marry him then go ahead with guarantee from his end that he'll not be palyful with yo because he's younger to yo by 4 year's think & act accordingly!!!!!!
answered 6 days ago by ramku19 (230 points)
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You are 34 now.It is sad that your lover and ex.husband has extra- marital affairs with other women.Perhaps you dumped him with in two months and living separately.

You should have known his character before marrying him and gone against the family.So sole responsibility of this situation lies with you.Now don't take another wrong decision.No details about the activities with cousin brother is mentioned here....except kissing and hug.

Feel the warmth of Cousin brother and enjoy sex.Never allow him to fuck without precaution.
answered 6 days ago by Motilal (8,030 points)
commented 4 days ago by Seema18041989 (120 points)
he still kiss me only.. i dont allow him for fuck. he agreed for this. he obay me if i allow him to kiss he kiss me if i allow him to
0 like 0 dislike
It is your life and you have a right to decide how you want to live your life so if you want to get married to him then marry him and do not care about other people who live around you. There are certain rules in the society and that rules would not allow you to get married to him but that does not mean that you cannot marry him.

If you both can be able to handle other things then marry him and live a happy life as it is your right. If you seek permission to get married to him then you may not get from your family or friends as he is your brother somehow so there is no need to take anyone’s opinion to get married to him. People will start accepting such union with time so do what you feel is good for you.
answered 6 days ago by alpesh kapdi (27,390 points)
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Seema,How you both are related? If he is your maternal cousin then it would not create any issues.But if he happens to be paternal cousin then it might create problems.This as per the traditional thinking of the society.
And as you both are adults you can get married with mutual consent even if you both happen to be paternal cousins.And I hope from your previous experience you must have learnt a lesson and would take  a correct decision.
Best of luck.
Prashant
answered 6 days ago by prashant69 (7,210 points)
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Hi Seema,

When you already staying together and love each other then go head and marry, make sure you give divorce to your husband , Also if you see a trouble from family change the city and live happily, If you don’t give a divorce he may blackmail you as you were in relationship not he.

Thanks
Joh
answered 5 days ago by jogv2k3 (210 points)
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Hi Seema

It a really though call marriage with cousin brother specially in Indian society. As per my personal opinion you can enjoy you life as you want but no need to publish your relationship in public or society. May be possible some of your social responsible members become aggressive to you decision.

Rest is your choice best of luck.
answered 4 days ago by kingmyaqueen (2,380 points)
commented 4 days ago by Seema18041989 (120 points)
my mother is ready for this. he told me that we will settle out side india after marry
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If you think he is a right person go ahead but take some time don't rush things and also ask him indirectly to see what he thinks if there is a condition arise where you both want to marry each other.
answered 4 days ago by myselfarun (1,790 points)
commented 4 days ago by Seema18041989 (120 points)
I am not able to understand what i ask to him.. he is ready to marry me and he told me that. what condition i ask to him tell me pls
0 like 0 dislike
Hi Seema,

First you should divorce your husband, consult a lawyer immediately. If you like to marry your cousin, only after getting divorce you can do it. Since you experienced bad married life, my suggestion would be you both can start live-in relationship for some months. When it comes to sex, take precautions don't get pregnant.

There is nothing wrong in marrying your cousin brother.  In South India, especially in Tamilnadu, younger brother will marry his own elder sister's daughter and having healthy childrens.

All the best
answered 3 days ago by kavitha80 (205 points)
0 like 0 dislike
Seema
1.You have already got divorce from your husband.
2.You work and financially independent.
3.Both work in the same office.
4.Your mother has already approved your marriage with cousin.
5.You can very well marry.
6.There is no need to go abroad to escape. If you both get opportunity to settle abroad for better prospects - it is okay.
7.Do not allow him to fuck before marriage.
answered 2 days ago by solliadi (2,910 points)

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