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Article: Getting ready for a threesome - Hear what People say and Read our Rules

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asked Feb 13 in Articles by longhands1 (77,170 points)

Getting ready for a threesome - Hear what People say and Read our Rules

Forget Fifty Shades and its red room of pain: it’s now the time for the threesome to take its turn on top, thanks to a new French film that’s getting tongues wagging.

Love, out tomorrow, sees American Murphy (Karl Glusman) and his girlfriend Electra (Aomi Muyock) get on so well with their pretty new neighbour Omi (Klara Kristin), they decide to invite her back to their apartment for sex. As jealousy, infidelity and pregnancy cause untold complications, the decision unravels their relationship.

So in this age, in which sex parties like Killing Kittens and threesome apps such as 3ndr are becoming ever more popular, are there pitfalls as well as pleasures?

We asked a trio of threesome fans to share their experiences…

 

THE COUPLE

Rekha, 26

SHE SAYS…

In my early twenties, I was cheated on. After that, I promised myself I would never give anyone the opportunity to break my heart again. I came to a conclusion that for the ‘bad boys’ I was attracted to, it is simply against their nature to have sex with one woman.

Then I met Rahul, the hottest man I could have ever dreamed of. Instead of giving him what I saw as the tools to hurt me with an affair, I gave him something no other woman could – the permission. In our agreement, only women were considered, and our first threesome was with a girl he used to hook up with occasionally. One night we all went for drinks and, luckily, I thought she was extremely hot and cool but not frightening.

I felt incredibly empowered by flirting and making out with a woman. But once that feeling disappeared, all my alarm bells went off and the feeling of jealousy returned. We had to come up with a list of rules to make sure nobody feels left out.

For example, I always choose the girl and he’s not permitted to push threesomes if I’m not feeling it. We practise safe sex and he must give me 200 per cent affection and attention after.

I can’t tell if one day we’ll stop having our little adventures.

I think the most important thing is to know the option is always there. I now work for 3nder. It isn’t the most elegant way to meet people but, hey, threesomes are first and foremost about fun, breaking norms and sharing a cuddle – sometimes with a total stranger.

 

Rahul, 32

HE SAYS…

When I met Rekha, I was blown away. She allowed me to be myself in a way I hadn’t been before. I’d come to a stage in my life where I knew I didn’t want a ‘traditional’ relationship.

We discussed our other relationships, and she was aware of girls I’d had connections with and one in particular interested her. The only reservation I had was to make sure it made our relationship stronger. In the end, it should be a fun and carefree thing: a very hot experience that three people are sharing. It was something we wanted to do to challenge ourselves. For me, partners should always look to keep things unpredictable and to push boundaries.

The experience was amazing, which is why we’ve repeated it. We were excited beforehand, as was my friend that we were meeting. From the start, the girls connected, the chemistry was there and it progressed quite naturally.

I think it’s old-fashioned to say ‘It’s every guy’s fantasy’ – of course it is but it’s also many girls’ fantasy. It’s not about a guy having two girls – it’s about three people exploring and enjoying each other. Describing anything as ‘rules’ is a bit inaccurate – I don’t have any rules in my head that we have to follow. It’s more about making sure we both always feel happy with the situation. It’s made us stronger, excited us and challenged us… as well as giving us some great stories.

 

THE LIFE-CHANGER

Leena, 30

When I was 17, I was living with my boyfriend. My female friend had just come out as gay. She came over for lunch one day and brought loads of alcohol – I thought, ‘Let’s face it, you’re coming over for sex!’

My boyfriend was completely fine with it. She and I went upstairs and started having sex, and halfway through he came up to the room and joined in. She didn’t stay in the room very long after that, unfortunately, so the sex only lasted about three minutes.

We then went to the pub to meet our good friends from school and it turned out really badly.

She started kissing the woman working behind the bar and I was distressed – this was someone I’d just had sex with. I drank whisky and gave a dramatic revelation to everyone about the threesome and it was the beginning of the end of that friendship group for me – it twisted the dynamic.

Now I’m gay and have girlfriends. I’m still really good friends with my boyfriend from that time – it was actually him who told me he thought I was gay.

In some respects, I don’t regret the threesome as it was part of my realisation about my sexuality. I’ve had other threesomes since. I go to sex parties like House Of Blue and that’s different – you have a code of understanding.

If you are considering a threesome, I’d say that would be a good place to start, rather than doing something with your own friends. That’s a bad idea.

 

Threesome advice:         Do’s and Don’ts

1. Figure out if you’re ready. If you have a partner, bear in mind the sort of person who survives this has a high trust level. When it goes right, it’s with people who aren’t madly in love, casually having fun, interested in exploring. Singles who sleep with couples or people they’re not going to see again fare really well in threesomes.

2. Never, ever do it with a friend. Answer an ad – that’s a far more honest way to do it. Then you don’t have that jealousy. Or take yourself off to a swingers’ club. Everyone knows what they are there for.

3. If you’re not entirely sure of what you’re doing, another option is to pair off and watch while they get up to something, then they watch while two of you get up to something.

4. Be very specific about what’s allowed and what’s not. Most of the time when it goes wrong it’s because people don’t talk it through. Noses are put out of joint because one person gets into it a bit too much, or women are astonished the boyfriend is kissing the guy.

5. If you see your partner looking anxious, even if you’re about to have the best orgasm in the world, you need to stop and think: ‘This is going to last about 30 seconds and the repercussions are going to last the whole of my life’.

6. Load on the reassurances: any sexual compliments need to be paid to your partner not to the other person, though you need to be polite! You need to say to your partner: ‘You look sexy’.




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1 Answer

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I think threesome is not everyone's cup of coffee!

You need lots of mental condition, before you get into this life style. It can be a game changer..It can either take you to hell or show you the doors of heaven.

So anyone who wants to try, just don't get over excited n get carried away with your thoughts. Think...Think....Think....Think....N........ Before you get into it

Fantasy is one think  n doing is different
answered Feb 15 by boldnsexy (385 points)
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