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I am a Middle aged widow. Can I have sex with my young Boyfriend?

asked Nov 14, 2017 in Questions by Sreeja (120 points)
edited Nov 15, 2017 by longhands1

I am a 57 year old widow and living alone. Since last six months, I have a boy friend. He is 27 years old and very energetic.

Firstly, we are very good friends. Later, I came to know that he is very interested in sex. He talks occasionally about sexual subjects. He always talks sexully with me.

Few days ago, he told me that he wants to have sex with me. I am also interested in having sex with him. But my problem is my vagina. It is dry. My last fucking was about twenty years ago. Now, I fear it will cause painful intercourse. I have heard that there are some lubricants which will help to improve the vaginal dryness, but I do not use these products.

My doubt is: Do these lubricants help pain less intercourse and will they help me to reach orgasm? He is a young and strong boy and I am a 57 years old woman. Will his hard fucking cause any problems to my health?

(Picture is only representational)

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9 Answers

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Sex would not be a problem at all so do not worry. For your dryness problem I would say you should use lubricates and that would not give you any adverse effect as those products are for sex and it would not give you any infections so relax.

You may feel pain because of not having sex for 20 years but that is bearable and you will start enjoying it soon and lubricates will reduce your pain up to the extent you will feel just pleasure so go for it. However, before having sex with him talk to him and let him know you want to take slow unless you feel comfortable and confidence in resuming your sex life.

If possible then start doing some intimate stuff with him and not proper sex and see how it goes like you both can cuddle, kiss, caressing each other, hand stuff, oral sex and other things that are sexual but not the penetrative sex and see whether you will retain your wetness or not. Your vagina is dry because there is no sexual activities for the last 20 years so naturally it will become dry over the period of time but once you restart sexual activities it will start getting wet.

There is nothing wrong in having sex with younger boy as it is your right to have sex and since you are widow there is no moral aspect which comes in the way. Make sure that you do not become emotionally dependent on him as this arrangement is not permanent one because whenever he finds his partner he will leave you so you have to be ready to have this relationship for shorter period of time. As long as he is available and you feel good having his company you can have sex with him all the time. Be confident and update us soon with your experience.
answered Nov 15, 2017 by alpesh kapdi (27,770 points)
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Yes you can as far as lubricants are concerned they are made for this special purpose so there is not anything to worry just buy a good one and have sex.
answered Nov 15, 2017 by myselfarun (1,850 points)
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Vaginal dryness after so many years is natural. It can be overcome by using olive oil or coconut oil in your sex organ.

Painful intercourse is likely to happen. You should have thought about it much earlier. Starved for long time, go ahead with boy friend. More matured married men might have a better choice. Bear the pain with clenched teeth, pain will be followed by heavenly pleasure.

How do you know he is energetic? Do you mean in sexual matter.
answered Nov 15, 2017 by Motilal (8,290 points)
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I would like to clear some facts.
1) in modern days people who's age is from 30 to 50 years are called middle age people.
2) you said that your bf is energetic. but that doesn't confirm that he is energetic too when it comes to sexual performance..

now your are 57 years old and widow. lack of sex since last 20 hears something. so your doubts about vaginal dryness are correct. but haven't you got any wetness in those years.
a well forplay stimulation can make your vagina wet. you can use lubrication which are available in markets. they are good but sometimes cause some itching. but no allergies or reaction so far I heard.

as your 57 years old, so there is very very very less chance that you get pregnant. but I suggest to use condoms. condoms can help you from std hiv and pregnancy. plus condoms are little bit lubricated. so they can help you to overcome the dryness issue.

and this is my personal opinion and I hope you understand what Im writing here. -. as you are widow and 57 years old, you need someone to love you someone to take care of you.  you still got sexual desires which indicates loneliness in your life. your bf is 27 years old. soon he may find another girl so he may can leave you. so your relationship with any young guys won't last that long.
you can have sex with many guys as you want. it's all on you which things you give high priority.
answered Nov 15, 2017 by Harsh.03 (1,030 points)
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Who told you, that a woman's sex Life ends when she reaches menopause? These are myths created by Society in order to keep widows in check and under the rule of Elders.

You may not have had sex for the last 20 years, after you became a widow, but that does not mean you cannot have penetrative sex.

Yes, you are right that after menopause, the vagina does not lubricate as much as it did when you were younger, but then even some young women have this problem about dry vagina. Don't let that bother you. There are lots of products available at chemists, to lubricate the vagina. At you age, you should be confident to go and get them.

You have lots of things going for you. You have a young companion, who has shown his desire for having sex with you and you, yourself are not averse to the idea. So you can definitely go for it. You have not told us if you have grown up children.

Why do you fear that his love making will be painful? Seeing porn, give us this idea. That a man keeps pounding a woman's vagina. You could be surprised that once you start, you could become a tigress and want more and more. Honestly, just hugging and kissing or allowing him to suckle at your breasts will make you feel like a new woman.

You need not worry about condoms, if you are sure that your partner does not have other sex partners.

One word of caution though. You partner may want to break free at some stage. You should be prepared for that. Do not get emotionally attached to him. That would become messy.

Go for it.
answered Nov 15, 2017 by longhands1 (85,850 points)
commented Nov 15, 2017 by Affi4u (120 points)
Yes you have your own life
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Yes you can definitely enjoy with him...As you are 57 there is no chance of getting pregnant after menopause  so no need to use any contraceptive methods...To overcome vaginal dryness you can use allovera gel or oil like coconut oil,mustard oil according to your choice.... With proper lubrication no problem in intercourse....Your vagina must be capacious enough to accommodate penis of a young man....So enjoy all kinds of foreplay and penetrative sex....All the best....
answered Nov 16, 2017 by Sexy Simpram (1,290 points)
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There is nothing wrong in having sex with your boy friend. Your vagina might become dry as you dont have sex for so much time. You can use lubricants for both anal and vagina sex.

I think you might get pain initially, but you will enjoy. My advise is to make yourself look like a new bride because some men like it, but don't keep any emotional strings with him. Teach him everything you know and keeping on experimenting new positions. This may increase the bond between both of you.

Hope this helps.

Thanking you
answered Nov 18, 2017 by Coolcracker420 (1,360 points)
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It is good to have sex with a young and strong boy. But always take precautions, to take care of your health. Sreeja, do you have any children?
answered Nov 19, 2017 by solliadi (3,210 points)
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You would love to have sex with a younger male. And he too would like a mature and experienced female to fuck with.

About dry vagina, you may see a gynaec for some hormone based medicines but it might not be an ultimate solution. Hence, use lube, like KY gel that works perfect.

Also spend longer time in foreplay with him - it will lead to your vagina getting wet to a great extent.

Best of luck for you both.
answered Dec 5, 2017 by zena69 (1,875 points)

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