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My Girlfriend does not get sexcited when I finger her. Why?

asked Dec 18, 2016 in Questions by Idontknow (200 points)
edited Dec 19, 2016 by longhands1

Does fingering a virgin girl makes her horny? I am fingering my girlfriend frequently. She does not moan or becomes horny. We did not have sex till date and we both are virgins.

Is it possible that after having sex will she become horny?

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5 Answers

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One thing you have to understand is this: your girlfriend may not be ready to start having sexual experiences, whether it is just gentle masturbation, or penetrative sex.

You haven't mentioned how old either of you are, and all we know is that you were both virgins. Having said that, a person's age is not necessarily indicative of whether they are ready to have sex or not.

You also have to consider whether the things you are doing make her feel comfortable or not. Young guys can be extremely clumsy, and it can lead to more discomfort than pleasure. You also have to understand a lot of girls are frightened of experiencing pain through being fingered or penetrated in any other way. The entrance to her vagina may still be extremely tight if her hymen has not broken, and this will lead to her being, to say the least, nervous and filled with anxiety.

Do yourself a favour and do an Internet search on the the female reproductive system, and learn to locate her clitoris. You do not require scientific knowledge to be able to look at basic diagrams, and you will see that her clitoris is located right at the top end of her vagina, at the apex of her labia, hidden beneath what is called a clitoral hood, which is roughly an allergist to a guys foreskin covering the sensitive end of his penis. You don't need to bury your fingers inside her in order to stimulate her clitoris. Her clitoris is the primary source of sexual pleasure for her. And you can lick and kiss it, or gently rub it with your fingertip, and she will find that far more enjoyable than you trying to ram your fingers inside her.

Think about it like this, if she masturbates you, the main pleasure is the stimulation of the head of your penis, not the base of it. If all she ever did was squeeze the base of your penis, you wouldn't get much pleasure from that, so if you gently rub her clitoris, either with your fingertips or your lips and tongue, you will give her the most delicious sensations. Trying to stuff your fingers inside ther vagina will do nothing to excite her, and will probably just cause discomfort. If this is what you are doing, then it's no wonder that she is not eager for you to do this frequently.

There are on line retail companies that you books about lovemaking. The joy of sex, or the Kama Sutra both provide you with the kind of information that should be available to all young men and women. The rules of this forum do not allow me to mention company names, but I'm sure you can think for yourself in this respect. It would be far better to read up on the things that you and your girlfriend can do together, and sit there watching pornography. Porn is definitely not the best way of learning about how to make love.

It is not ready for the sexual side of the relationship, don't push her, or you may push her away altogether. When she is ready, treat her with love and kindness, and be very gentle with her.

Good luck,

answered Dec 19, 2016 by sexysalma (14,995 points)
selected Dec 26, 2016 by Idontknow
commented Dec 26, 2016 by Idontknow (200 points)
Thanku for ur valuable suggestion...
0 like 0 dislike
Yes.. it's Possible and she would become more horner than ever .
So You got my Answer  =_=
answered Dec 18, 2016 by sweet guy (125 points)
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You are 21,what is the age of your girl friend.Minor or major.Kiss,embrace,suck and fondle her breasts.Fingering and sex may be avoided.Will you get sadistic pleasure,if she moans.Ask her to do fellatio on you.It is difficult for me to tell,when she will become horny.
answered Dec 18, 2016 by Motilal (8,040 points)
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It sounds that you are doing it the wrong way or you do not know how to finger the girl. You should ask her what she likes and what she wants you to do while fingering her. Ask her to guide your finger to the spot she likes you to touch.

There are many girls who do not feel anything in fingering act so she might be one of them. There are many girls who love sex and feel more connected in sex than other form of sex. However, you have to communicate with her about what she loves and how she wants you to make her honey.

It is normal if she does not get excited when you finger her so do not worry and do things which make her happy. If she does not like fingering then you should stop doing it. My wife does not like fingering but when I was with my girlfriend she wanted me to finger her daily as she preferred fingering to real sex so each girl is different and likes different things in sex. 

answered Dec 19, 2016 by alpesh kapdi (27,390 points)
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She's not aroused probably because of 2 reasons.

1. She's nervous and afraid or feeling guilty.
2. You are doing it wrong

For the first reason, try to talk with her, understand her concerns and connect with her emotionally and go ahead accordingly.

For the second reason, learn to appreciate her body, take it slow. Try doing different things and observe what's making her more aroused. And do try rubbing her clit.

If she's wet down there, it's arousing her. Observe this.

Sadiq Khan
answered Dec 19, 2016 by sadiq_khan (1,040 points)

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