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How to be free and frank with wife in sexual matters?

asked Aug 4, 2015 in Questions by wildsex2016 (550 points)
edited Aug 5, 2015 by longhands1


We are a married couple.We have oral sex sometime and also show porn movie to my wife.

Now my problem is: I have high sexual desire and want to get fulfilled but I observe that sometimes my wife agrees for oral sex whenver she is excited. Many times she is nude in front me when she takes bath and come to room after bath and changes clothes in front of me. She wants to see me nude when I change my clothes but I am shy. Most of the time I initiate sex and she sometimes avoids having sex and I will not get sleep due to lack of sex. We see porn together, but whenever I see porn movie on my PC she watches secretly and ask what you are doing. Then I tell her nothing and minimise the window and browser of my PC because she may feel bad about me for watching porn and she may not respect me.

Now I need your genuine guidance for keeping sexual relationship with wife, so that I can get sexually satisfied without any tension.


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2 Answers

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Dear Wildsex,

Like my name I really dont know but I have given you an honest appraisal.

It sounds like you both want it but there is some limitation in your communication that is prohibiting both of you from having a satisfying time together.  It hard to suggest strategies and I assume you have communicated with her.  Lying about watching porn is not a good move she knows what you are doing and that to me might be a sign that she too secretly want to have it too.  Like I said both of you are shy and communication seems to be awkward.

How to break this is going to be hard, first stop telling her lies tell her I am watching a porn movie and it has a really interesting scene, I think you might like this as well, is perhaps a better response than nothing.  You are guilty and not expressing yourself either.

Do fun things together like dancing naked when you see her undressing grab her by the hand.  If this is the morning and you are going to work it is going to keep the image in your minds all day and when you come back from work start the dance.  Do you comment on that she looks great and is wonderful?  Does she do the same to you?

Maybe you can both sit down in bed one night and ask her a question what do you like about my body.  Hopefully she will ask you the same question.  This type of dialogue might just open the key that is holding you back.  Remember no food in the vagina but you can play with sauce and cream externally.

Otherwise you might need to ask another question giving me more details.  See a relationship is about trust and if you are both shy and locked in you are not going to always say the things that are needed.  Play some games together naked.  Could be fun for you and remember to always tell her she looks great.

I hope i have given you some ice breakers that might open the dialogue and communication.

Wish the best.

answered Aug 5, 2015 by Idontknow. (800 points)
selected Aug 5, 2015 by wildsex2016
1 like 0 dislike
I strongly feel that you need to have sincere discussion with your wife about what you like and dislike and at the same time try to know her likes and dislikes. Your wife will not lose respect if you see porn movies but definitely, she would lose respect if you see it secretly and in your case, you are sure that she knows about your activities on PC.

Discuss with her that you like to see porn movies and would like to see it together if she feels uncomfortable about it then you should not force her. Your shyness will disappear slowly when you develop good comfort level with your wife but right now, you need discussion and respect each other’s view on the subject.
answered Aug 5, 2015 by alpesh kapdi (23,335 points)

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